How would you murder someone and get away with it

StevenK

ng.com SFII tournament winner 2002-2021
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An off duty copper once kindly told me your best bet is to kill them at sea, dump the body and claim an accident - very little chance of a body being found and without a body it's difficult to prove anything at all. However, unless you're a trawler captain arguing with his single crew mate this seems quite a contrived situation to get yourself into.

So how would you do it?

This thread could also be called Not What Bibs Did.
 

Rot

Calvin & Hobbes, ,
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TBH.... with forensic science... makes life a tad harder...

A policeman once told me... that the best way to get away with murder is to be slightly over the limit... and run the person over...

If you have a good track record and not OVERLY drunk... you get a slap on the wrist and probation...

xROTx

PS. As everyone knows... i love watching... SNAPPED: Women who kill...

One of my fav episodes was when a woman claimed to have watched a lot of crime programs and so they knew how to get away with murder...

Subsequently.... she's doing a life term somewhere in teh US'A...:keke:
 

LoneSage

A Broken Man
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In America, if a robber comes into your home and you shoot them and they live, you're opening yourself to litigation.

But as I was told on the shooting range one day, 'dead men can't sue'.

Here is a disgusting and tragic event where a Japanese exchange student, in 1992, knocked on a house's door thinking it was the address for a Halloween party and instead got shot to death by a piece of shit who walked away scot free because, "durr I was in fear for my life," and the jurors were retarded pieces of shit themselves apparently: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yoshihiro_Hattori
 

StevenK

ng.com SFII tournament winner 2002-2021
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In America, if a robber comes into your home and you shoot them and they live, you're opening yourself to litigation.

But as I was told on the shooting range one day, 'dead men can't sue'.

Here is a disgusting and tragic event where a Japanese exchange student, in 1992, knocked on a house's door thinking it was the address for a Halloween party and instead got shot to death by a piece of shit who walked away scot free because, "durr I was in fear for my life," and the jurors were retarded pieces of shit themselves apparently: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yoshihiro_Hattori

Depressing.
 

Mr Bakaboy

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In America, if a robber comes into your home and you shoot them and they live, you're opening yourself to litigation.
But as I was told on the shooting range one day, 'dead men can't sue'.

No, but their family sure can.

Other then finding the right pig farmer? Find the right way to eat through bone. Certain acids I'm sure can do it. Though if you are buying that sort of stuff right before the murder good luck getting away with it.
 

Mac91

Hinako's Cook
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If the objective is just to kill probably a homless guy in the city. There's plenty down secluded alleys; I doubt anyone will notice if one goes.
 

titchgamer

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Well dumping at sea worked for Dexter lol

Me personally I believe is using what you have, Being in the Midlands its a long way to the sea but we do have lots of flooded mine shafts that get used by farmers for carcass disposal.

Perfect place for a dead body I reckon.
 

lachlan

VB longneck at 8am in the fuckin mornin'
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The only real chance you have of pulling a murder off is if it's completely random and you've removed all possible ties like area, potential fibers, dna etc. In other words to be a ghost.

I like watching forensic files and countless other murder detective shows and while they all get solved it's only the success stories, what about the ones that get away with it? I bet there are plenty.
 

famicommander

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You alright Steve? You've been making some lonesage threads lately
 

oliverclaude

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...what about the ones that get away with it? I bet there are plenty.

Exactly. I doubt for example, that the murderer(s) of Ján Kuciak will ever be found, ergo that's one way to do it in order to get away with it. Avoiding a clear motive seems more important, than worrying about DNA.

The O.J. Simpson case shows however, that sometimes you don't have to worry about either. Hmm... if I had to do it, I'd try to employ elements of that case by design, which had been random in the actual trial, like 'creating' another Mark Fuhrman or Ron Shipp.
 

LoneSage

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good, good, give in to the shitposting

Everyone knows LoneSage-styled threads are the best anyway
 

Damulta

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Wrap them in barbed wire, and drop them in a river or lake.....fish food
 

fake

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Library shelf chain reaction topple
 

GohanX

Hollywood Hulk Gohan
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If I were to have planned the perfect murder I sure wouldn't post my plans on a public message board that can easily be found by the authorities.
 

madman

Blame madman, You Know You Want To.,
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You alright Steve? You've been making some lonesage threads lately

I think the first sign of LS level depression/alcoholism was when he got upset at a guy in a movie making marinara sauce.

For the perfect murder I would hire xorthen to go take care of my enemy with one of his katanas.
 

Craig

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Down here in New Orleans they say "drop 'em off for the gators..." I think very little is found when that happens.
 

Massive Urethra Chode

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poison them with carfentanyl in a situation in which it looks like they OD'd by themselves.

make it look like an accident... 300 micrograms can kill a person... stick it in their food, drink, etc
 

WoodyXP

Setsuna's Owl Keeper,
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You can't get away with anything in this day and age so I wouldn't even try to murder anybody.
 
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