How do I get girls to like me?

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Tiger Uppercut

Quiz Detective
Joined
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Mak, I honestly support you but I think you have social dyslexia. Who looks for love at a Starbucks? That's the first thing that I noticed.

Starbucks is a pretty cold place, emotionally. It's like looking for braille sheet music.

Get away from the college types. They are not looking for love or a lasting relationship of any kind, personal or intimate. That's a fact. They're just looking to party for a few years.

Move away from Texas. I suggest somewhere like Illinois, 30 miles south of Chicago. Big city convenience is just a half hour drive away, but in a small town of 40,000 it's easier to get a girl that means something. If that doesn't work out, there's the windy city with lots of opportunity.

Quit with your stupid Internet typing as well. All this, "I am the dark minion, and I will make them feel my anguish!" Emo crap is old. All your girlfriends have read it in this thread by now and they think you're an idiot for it because you don't talk like that in real life. If you do talk like that in real life, stop it.

I want you to reduce your body fat percentage to under 7% in the next nine months. You look like a hot dog. You've got mad muscle underneath all of that flab, and since you're looking for a pretty girl you must obviously assume they're looking for a pretty guy. Make yourself prettier. Do what I said. Look up 'rolling keto' and follow that diet for a few months. You'll look like Bruce Lee and Andy Kaufman had a baby.

Smile more when you're with women.
 

Makismo

Ghost of Captain Kidd
Joined
May 14, 2002
Posts
1,670
Tiger Uppercut said:
Mak, I honestly support you but I think you have social dyslexia. Who looks for love at a Starbucks? That's the first thing that I noticed.

Starbucks is a pretty cold place, emotionally. It's like looking for braille sheet music.

Get away from the college types. They are not looking for love or a lasting relationship of any kind, personal or intimate. That's a fact. They're just looking to party for a few years.

Move away from Texas. I suggest somewhere like Illinois, 30 miles south of Chicago. Big city convenience is just a half hour drive away, but in a small town of 40,000 it's easier to get a girl that means something. If that doesn't work out, there's the windy city with lots of opportunity.

Quit with your stupid Internet typing as well. All this, "I am the dark minion, and I will make them feel my anguish!" Emo crap is old. All your girlfriends have read it in this thread by now and they think you're an idiot for it because you don't talk like that in real life. If you do talk like that in real life, stop it.

I want you to reduce your body fat percentage to under 7% in the next nine months. You look like a hot dog. You've got mad muscle underneath all of that flab, and since you're looking for a pretty girl you must obviously assume they're looking for a pretty guy. Make yourself prettier. Do what I said. Look up 'rolling keto' and follow that diet for a few months. You'll look like Bruce Lee and Andy Kaufman had a baby.

Smile more when you're with women.

Dude, I will say this one last time to the board. My digital camera is CRAP and it makes me look FAT! I don't even look like that! Fuck, someone come and meet me in person and see how skinny I really am. For the record, I am 5 feet 11.5 inches tall and now weigh 155 pounds. Does that sound FAT to you?

Also, The girl who I really cared for - I asked her to pray for me because I really do think that at this point, I am going NUTS! I even wrote my list of quotes on her webpage. I called it "The Fallen Angel." I wasn't referring to myself but I thought that since i like to write, I might write a play about a fallen angel. Seeing that she "claims" to be religious and all, I thought she would like them. Instead, she just erases them and my happy New Years message.

They WERE NOT fucked up psycho messages either. They were nice ones I assure you. I took that as a great insult and erased every nice thing I ever said about her on her webpage and kicked her off my buddy list. I was nice to her for a year and did everything I could to make her happy but it just wasn't good enough. She is obviously a FAKE person who just likes to talk and say that she is into the faith but nothing could be further from the truth. She didn't even attempt to help me. The moment she found out that I was having "mental" problems, she just got up and left. A TRUE friend doesn't leave someone stranded when they are in their time of need.

Hell, I she told me that she was seeing dead people, I wouldn't run the other way - I would try to help her. I know she is reading this because I gave her the link to this site. I hope she reads the whole damn thing and sees the lengths I went to to impress her but it wasn't good enough. I may be well off but I am not super rich like she is and in the end, all she wanted was a super rich boyfriend who had a large following and not some mixed up poet/pottery dude. I would have done anything for her but I guess it doesn't matter to her.

Fine, if she wants MR. Hot Shot, then she can have him and he can have her. I doubt he would stick around if her family went broke. I would have hung out with her even if she didn't have a god damn red cent to her name. That IS what caring is about I have learned.. When you care about someone you will stick by them even if no one else will. If you abandon them in their greatest time of need, you are not only not their friend but a hypocrite. She claims to follow the path of God but that is bullshit, she just does that to make herself look holy I have found out. I seriously doubt she ever prayed for my sick mother at all. I know she won't pray for my misguided soul. I guess that is all for now.


PS - I see your point. I should move away from Dallas. Also, I can't smile anymore because women piss me off!
 

Makismo

Ghost of Captain Kidd
Joined
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Posts
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By the way, the post above is about the girl whom I gave my bowl too - my best work. I am not talking about that stupid slut who I just posted the pictures up of the other day. Then again, all women are sluts to some degree - you just have to know how to push their magic button to get the prize.
 

Magnaflux

Onigami Isle Castaway
20 Year Member
Joined
Nov 20, 2001
Posts
13,738
Mak should be in bdsm, at least that humiliation is (usually) kept private.
 

RAINBOW PONY

DASH DARK ANDY K,
20 Year Member
Joined
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Posts
24,310
Makismo said:
all women are sluts to some degree - you just have to know how to push their magic button to get the prize.

hell, that's better advice than Steves entire secrets to women thread.
 

Nesagwa

Beard of Zeus,
20 Year Member
Joined
May 17, 2002
Posts
21,322
Magnaflux said:
The chicks love my large hands. I feel sorry for those born with average to below average hands.

Do the girls love that supergun?
 

Magnaflux

Onigami Isle Castaway
20 Year Member
Joined
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Posts
13,738
Nesagwa said:
Do the girls love that supergun?

Only if Magical Drop 3 is involved, but the supergun I bought from you is in the hands of a happy new owner.
 

Nesagwa

Beard of Zeus,
20 Year Member
Joined
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Posts
21,322
Magnaflux said:
Only if Magical Drop 3 is involved, but the supergun I bought from you is in the hands of a happy new owner.

Well as long as he likes it.

Well and the womens too.
 

Tacitus

Volatile Memory Construct - SN://0467839
Staff member
Joined
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Posts
15,121
Makismo said:
Dude, I will say this one last time to the board. My digital camera is CRAP and it makes me look FAT! I don't even look like that! Fuck, someone come and meet me in person and see how skinny I really am. For the record, I am 5 feet 11.5 inches tall and now weigh 155 pounds. Does that sound FAT to you?

Also, The girl who I really cared for - I asked her to pray for me because I really do think that at this point, I am going NUTS! I even wrote my list of quotes on her webpage. I called it "The Fallen Angel." I wasn't referring to myself but I thought that since i like to write, I might write a play about a fallen angel. Seeing that she "claims" to be religious and all, I thought she would like them. Instead, she just erases them and my happy New Years message.

They WERE NOT fucked up psycho messages either. They were nice ones I assure you. I took that as a great insult and erased every nice thing I ever said about her on her webpage and kicked her off my buddy list. I was nice to her for a year and did everything I could to make her happy but it just wasn't good enough. She is obviously a FAKE person who just likes to talk and say that she is into the faith but nothing could be further from the truth. She didn't even attempt to help me. The moment she found out that I was having "mental" problems, she just got up and left. A TRUE friend doesn't leave someone stranded when they are in their time of need.

Hell, I she told me that she was seeing dead people, I wouldn't run the other way - I would try to help her. I know she is reading this because I gave her the link to this site. I hope she reads the whole damn thing and sees the lengths I went to to impress her but it wasn't good enough. I may be well off but I am not super rich like she is and in the end, all she wanted was a super rich boyfriend who had a large following and not some mixed up poet/pottery dude. I would have done anything for her but I guess it doesn't matter to her.

Fine, if she wants MR. Hot Shot, then she can have him and he can have her. I doubt he would stick around if her family went broke. I would have hung out with her even if she didn't have a god damn red cent to her name. That IS what caring is about I have learned.. When you care about someone you will stick by them even if no one else will. If you abandon them in their greatest time of need, you are not only not their friend but a hypocrite. She claims to follow the path of God but that is bullshit, she just does that to make herself look holy I have found out. I seriously doubt she ever prayed for my sick mother at all. I know she won't pray for my misguided soul. I guess that is all for now.


PS - I see your point. I should move away from Dallas. Also, I can't smile anymore because women piss me off!


Oh Fatty Makismo, will you ever win? (insert Mak pratfall here.)
 

Stinky-Dinkins

South Town Hero
15 Year Member
Joined
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I hope Makismo doesn't post on this page again - it'll put it over its weight threshold.
 

pixeljunkie

Whilst Drunk., I Found God., Booze = Bad.,
15 Year Member
Joined
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Posts
5,978
Stinky-Dinkins said:
I hope Makismo doesn't post on this page again - it'll put it over its weight threshold.

Seriously...there will be a long period where nobody hears from him....then I will post a link to a Dallas Morning News "Triple homicide" story....involving rape....and sheep.
 

Tacitus

Volatile Memory Construct - SN://0467839
Staff member
Joined
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Posts
15,121
Makismo said:
Dude, I will say this one last time to the board. My digital camera is CRAP and it makes me look FAT! I don't even look like that! Fuck, someone come and meet me in person and see how skinny I really am. For the record, I am 5 feet 11.5 inches tall and now weigh 155 pounds. Does that sound FAT to you?

First it's a camera, next it's diabetes... after that a glandular problem. Sorry fatty, no one's buying. :tickled:


Also, The girl who I really cared for - I asked her to pray for me because I really do think that at this point, I am going NUTS!

There's no doubt about that.

I even wrote my list of quotes on her webpage. I called it "The Fallen Angel." I wasn't referring to myself but I thought that since i like to write, I might write a play about a fallen angel. Seeing that she "claims" to be religious and all, I thought she would like them.

If it's anything like the soft-porn-housewife crap you spew here, I would advise against that. Don't you see how fucking head-itchy-cringe-inducing shit that is? If you have any hope to get laid, shit like this just doesn't fly.


They WERE NOT fucked up psycho messages either. They were nice ones I assure you.

The sign of a crazy person is that they don't know they're crazy. (or something like that.) I'm sure you'll be repeating to Clarise Starling while you wear her uterus as a helmet. "Is she a great big old fat person?"

Don't forget Mrs. Littman's card. :kekeke:

I took that as a great insult and erased every nice thing I ever said about her on her webpage and kicked her off my buddy list. I was nice to her for a year and did everything I could to make her happy but it just wasn't good enough. She is obviously a FAKE person who just likes to talk and say that she is into the faith but nothing could be further from the truth.

Maybe... MAYBE!!! You creep people out? That's why you repeatedly get that reaction? Seriously, dude... you don't seem too stupid and after ALL of these women have rejected you, you'd be smart enough to deduce what the common denominator is in all of this.... YOU. Why not change the way you act and TRY not to engage in these sociopathic, unhinged acts?

She didn't even attempt to help me. The moment she found out that I was having "mental" problems, she just got up and left. A TRUE friend doesn't leave someone stranded when they are in their time of need.

I'm sure you hide it real well too. :chimp:

I know she is reading this because I gave her the link to this site.

Don't you see how stupid this is? This is the crux of your problem. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU GIVE SOMEONE AN INTERNET LINK? ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS? ON A VIDEO GAME WEBSITE? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? Christ, dude... this has GOT to click somewhere in your fucking skull that "MAYBE THIS ISN'T THE BEST IDEA IF I EVER HOPE TO GET LAID???"


I hope she reads the whole damn thing and sees the lengths I went to to impress her but it wasn't good enough. I may be well off but I am not super rich like she is and in the end, all she wanted was a super rich boyfriend who had a large following and not some mixed up poet/pottery dude. I would have done anything for her but I guess it doesn't matter to her.

Why do you care? Why are you trying to impress? Be yourself... TRY TO BE N-O-R-M-A-L and not H. P. Fucking Lovecraft when you describe your fucking love life or some twat rejects you? Do you think this thread has in any way a chance to seal the deal on the pussay?

Fine, if she wants MR. Hot Shot,

No she probably wants someone that won't wear her taint on a necklace after she's killed. I have no doubt in my mind that if this whole persona isn't just an act (I'm pretty sure it is.. or at least trumped up... I'm 75% sure it's a gag) that you really are going to end up murdering or at least seriously maiming any woman that you end up with. You probably don't think it now or wouldn't even consider it while you're in your depressive cycle, but seriously... I see you having a major psychotic break should a female (or male) cause you any emotional trauma. If you haven't already and this whole act is the real deal, you need some serious SERIOUS psycho-therapy and some heavy psychotropics.
 
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Magnaflux

Onigami Isle Castaway
20 Year Member
Joined
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Posts
13,738
Mak could seriously improve his chances by typing love letters in Klingonese.
 

evil wasabi

The Jongmaster
20 Year Member
Joined
Aug 20, 2000
Posts
60,435
Makismo said:
Dude, I will say this one last time to the board. My digital camera is CRAP and it makes me look FAT! I don't even look like that! Fuck, someone come and meet me in person and see how skinny I really am. For the record, I am 5 feet 11.5 inches tall and now weigh 155 pounds. Does that sound FAT to you?

Also, The girl who I really cared for - I asked her to pray for me because I really do think that at this point, I am going NUTS! I even wrote my list of quotes on her webpage. I called it "The Fallen Angel." I wasn't referring to myself but I thought that since i like to write, I might write a play about a fallen angel. Seeing that she "claims" to be religious and all, I thought she would like them. Instead, she just erases them and my happy New Years message.

They WERE NOT fucked up psycho messages either. They were nice ones I assure you. I took that as a great insult and erased every nice thing I ever said about her on her webpage and kicked her off my buddy list. I was nice to her for a year and did everything I could to make her happy but it just wasn't good enough. She is obviously a FAKE person who just likes to talk and say that she is into the faith but nothing could be further from the truth. She didn't even attempt to help me. The moment she found out that I was having "mental" problems, she just got up and left. A TRUE friend doesn't leave someone stranded when they are in their time of need.

Hell, I she told me that she was seeing dead people, I wouldn't run the other way - I would try to help her. I know she is reading this because I gave her the link to this site. I hope she reads the whole damn thing and sees the lengths I went to to impress her but it wasn't good enough. I may be well off but I am not super rich like she is and in the end, all she wanted was a super rich boyfriend who had a large following and not some mixed up poet/pottery dude. I would have done anything for her but I guess it doesn't matter to her.

Fine, if she wants MR. Hot Shot, then she can have him and he can have her. I doubt he would stick around if her family went broke. I would have hung out with her even if she didn't have a god damn red cent to her name. That IS what caring is about I have learned.. When you care about someone you will stick by them even if no one else will. If you abandon them in their greatest time of need, you are not only not their friend but a hypocrite. She claims to follow the path of God but that is bullshit, she just does that to make herself look holy I have found out. I seriously doubt she ever prayed for my sick mother at all. I know she won't pray for my misguided soul. I guess that is all for now.


PS - I see your point. I should move away from Dallas. Also, I can't smile anymore because women piss me off!


Why don't you move to China or Thailand? At least there you can get a girl who won't know if you look good or bad. I mean, seriously, you're killing yourself here in the US. Just move.
 

Makismo

Ghost of Captain Kidd
Joined
May 14, 2002
Posts
1,670
I am logging out....

By the way, VT - I didn't read your post, so you spent all that time typing for nothing...

Bye Bye.

If you want to send me a message then send it to my email address. I won't be logging back in. This place is dead to me.
 

Tacitus

Volatile Memory Construct - SN://0467839
Staff member
Joined
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Posts
15,121
Makismo said:
I am logging out....

By the way, VT - I didn't read your post, so you spent all that time typing for nothing...

Bye Bye.

If you want to send me a message then send it to my email address. I won't be logging back in. This place is dead to me.


Yes you did, I know you did, fatty mcbutterpants.

Let us all know when you finally kill yourself or are arraigned so we can come up with a funny tribute page.

Oh fatty makismo, will you ever win?
 

Tacitus

Volatile Memory Construct - SN://0467839
Staff member
Joined
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Posts
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Makismo said:
By the way, VT - I didn't read your post, so you spent all that time typing for nothing...

You probably looked at that post's length, started breathing heavy and shoved another ho-ho in your mouth, eh, chubs?
 

pixeljunkie

Whilst Drunk., I Found God., Booze = Bad.,
15 Year Member
Joined
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Posts
5,978
Nostra-freekin-damus

This thread will crash the NG.com servers when Drudgereport links to it after Mak goes on his killing spree and makes front-page news.
 

Tacitus

Volatile Memory Construct - SN://0467839
Staff member
Joined
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Posts
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Can someone photo shop mak's face into this picture?


gumb5.jpg
 

Tacitus

Volatile Memory Construct - SN://0467839
Staff member
Joined
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Posts
15,121
Makismo said:
I am logging out....

By the way, VT - I didn't read your post, so you spent all that time typing for nothing...

Bye Bye.

If you want to send me a message then send it to my email address. I won't be logging back in. This place is dead to me.


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