Soon to be first time dad. HELP!

c0nn0r · Sep 5, 2018

Hey guys,

I'm at that point in my life when I'm just a few months away from becoming a first time Dad. I have absolutely no idea what to expect, and I'm hoping that some experienced Dads here can offer some tips, insights, stories and etc.

Everyone keeps telling me how my life is over, and that I will have zero time for myself which is frightening.

Specifically, how has becoming a Dad changed your relationship with video games? Still able to play? Changed your habits? Stopped playing for a few years? Never stopped playing and hoarding and lost your wife and child because you have an addiction to games?

HELP!

GohanX · Sep 5, 2018

Handhelds, handhelds, handhelds.

RAZO · Sep 5, 2018

Your life isn't over, that's complete bullshit. It's a little rough at first and you will start seeing things from a different perspective and focus more on your family and less on yourself but I would say my life changed for the better.

You still will have time to yourself, maybe not much in the beginning but I wouldn't stress. I only have one though. I can't speak for people who have 3+ kids.

As far as gaming go's, I've lost some interest over the years but get the bug every once and awhile and still enjoy playing. As a collector, I've sold almost all my original games off and just stick to flash carts, modded systems, emulation. Dont feel the need or the desire to want to own original games, as long as I have a way of playing them, it works for me.

You will have more stuff to do like Bday Parties, Play Dates, Religious stuff like communion parties, Gymnastics, Soccer Practice, Piano Lessons, Dance Class, maybe some after school tutoring, apple picking, pumpkin picking, theme parks, playgrounds, you know stuff like that.
Congrats By the way.

NeoSneth · Sep 5, 2018

Back when i played MMO's, i knew dads that would still be on for hours a day. They would play with the kid in the room.
Didn't seem like it impacted their time until the kids were in sports.

jeffkun34 · Sep 5, 2018

Easy joke. Like anything, you have to prioritize your time. Of course your kid is going to come first and you might even realize gaming is not so important anymore.

Of course, I say this as someone who never had kids of my own and can only speak to what I have seen from other new parents.

Montatez · Sep 5, 2018

As long as your not an addict of one thing or another, your fine. Being a dad is easy, just remember to be loving and stern all at the same time.

Just do the things you love with the kids and you will find you enjoy your hobbies even more when you see their excitement.

GohanX · Sep 5, 2018

jeffkun34 said:

/thread

F4U57 · Sep 5, 2018

Everything you know is about to change, be prepared for that and you’ll handle it better. If gaming is big in your life you won’t have much time for it at first, maybe more when the baby gets into a routine, but really, you shouldn't be focusing on gaming.

Also, there is no right way or wrong way to parenting as long as it’s for the benefit of the baby. As in, there is many different types of good parenting, do what feels right for you and your missus, not what the book says, the YouTube video or the midwives (except they do know a lot). You’re going to have to deal with heaps of outsider opinions, take them with a grain of salt. Especially mother in-law opinions. Do what you feel is right. Good luck and congrats!

DevilRedeemed · Sep 5, 2018

I don't get this thread. Dude, you're about to have an amazing experience, unless you didn't want to be a dad in the first place, and you're worried about gaming time? Just enjoy the trip. The first few months will be intense probably but you'll have time to do your own thing if you want or need it.
Congrats

BlackaneseNiNjA · Sep 5, 2018

First off, Congratulations!!

Becoming a dad was one of the absolute best things to ever happen in my life. As it has already been stated here, everything in your life will indeed be completely different (but in an awesome way). For the first couple of months games will probably be the last thing on your mind though as sleep starts to go out the window initially, but eventually you’ll start to regain a little time for minor stuff like games again.

As for balancing the hobby, there’s less time for games in general but you may find yourself able to play different types of games that are more “pick-up n’ play friendly” rather than open world/story heavy type console games. Handhelds are perfect for this and you may find that vita/psp/3ds/ds is perfect for smaller gaming sessions (remote play has also come in handy). Since neogeo games are perfect for these type of quick sessions, they have remained my gaming mainstays. It’s the long narration-heavy console games I find I don’t have as much patience for these days (long cut scenes, patch downloads, load times, etc etc etc).

That baby always comes first so give em tons of love. Minor hobby stuff like gaming can always sort itself out later. Congrats again!

GohanX · Sep 5, 2018

The birth of my daughter actually coincided with the launch of the Vita. I generally pulled it out when the baby napped, which is often, but was only for short bursts. The handheld was perfect since you could just put it in standby mode and attend to the baby's needs, then resume whenever. I actually played completely through Uncharted and Virtua Tennis 4's campaign mode in a short time, which was probably a good 40 hours total.

What I couldn't really do was get too involved in a console game. I couldn't play stuff using a joystick when she napped (the clickiness of the stick woke her up) and I couldn't play old systems with loud CD drives. Also I usually couldn't play more than a few minutes of anything at a time so console RPGs were out. The baby would be entertained if she liked the music, my daughter loved the music in Air Zonk so I played that frequently.

After a few months things will normalize, the baby will actually sleep a decent amount of time and you can get back to your normal routine, modified to take care of the baby, of course.

DevilRedeemed · Sep 5, 2018

Also a little further down the line having the little one next to you whilst you play videogames should be fun as hell for the two of you.

Mr. Mort · Sep 5, 2018

The first 3 months or so we’re pretty tough for me due to the lack of sleep until the little man started sleeping for longer stretches of time. I didn’t do much gaming at all during that timeframe.

My son’s in elementary school now, but I don’t even bother trying to play games at all during the day. I only play at night, after he’s gone to bed, and after I handle my chores around the house. It doesn’t leave me much time to play, maybe an hour or two during weeknights, but I sure as hell can’t/don’t play every night. I usually can play 2-3 weeknights, and weekend evenings.

What other have said is also true for me, I have no time or patience to devote to RPG’s or massive
40+ hour games, as they take several months for me to get through since I can only play for an hour or two at a time. I gravitate towards action/arcade/retro games that I can play in short sessions. I don’t do much handheld gaming, but I can see how that makes sense.

Parenthood is tough, exhausting, and time-consuming, but totally worth it. Kids in the 3-10 year range are fun. I enjoy hanging out with my son. Kids have an innocent jubilation that can rub off on you, and remind you of what being a kid was like. Sometimes it’s awesome to go out & play street hockey, or play with Hot Wheels & legos, or pretend to be a super-hero.

Congrats, dude, enjoy your little one while he/she is still little, it passes by quickly.

ggallegos1 · Sep 5, 2018

Bookmarking this thread for the future, solid advice

jsiucho · Sep 5, 2018

Congrats Bro... am in the same boat,, but till March/April..

Gaston · Sep 5, 2018

Congrats dude.
Parenting is mostly time consuming the first couple of years. We have two kids, 3,5 and 1 yo and the smaller one takes up lots of time. The older not so much, he loves to play with legos and can entertain himself well. I used to play games a lot but toned it down when our kids were born. Now I game more but in shorter bursts. Older ('retro') games are excellent for this because you don't need 100+ hour games in your life right now. I am slowly starting to pick up the AAA games again - gow being the last one I completed in a week. And the best part is you won't mind playing less because parenting makes you realise what is truly important. U having a boy or a girl?

RAZO · Sep 5, 2018

Mr. Mort said:
Congrats, dude, enjoy your little one while he/she is still little, it passes by quickly.

This.

Don't let the Wife handle most of the Child Activities either. You have to want to be a part of his/her life. It's important for the Child's physce that both Parents give a shit and both show support. That old school mentality from back in the days were the Father just worked and did his own thing while the wife took care of the kids is out the window.

BlackaneseNiNjA · Sep 5, 2018

RAZO said:
This.

Don't let the Wife handle most of the Child Activities either. You have to want to be a part of his/her life. It's important for the Child's physce that both Parents give a shit and both show support. That old school mentality from back in the days were the Father just worked and did his own thing while the wife took care of the kids is out the window.

Truth.

GohanX · Sep 5, 2018

Mr. Mort said:
I have no time or patience to devote to RPG’s or massive 40+ hour games, as they take several months for me to get through since I can only play for an hour or two at a time.

That's the damn truth. On newer stuff, games that only last like 10 hours will be your new best friend (and it will still take a couple of weeks to get through.)

Lastblade · Sep 5, 2018

Being a dad isn't all consuming... that's mom's job. I have played and finished plenty of games as a dad, including massive RPGs. I just put in 110 hours into EDF 4.1 the last 3 months. It is all about priorities. It also gets easier as they get older, and they love to watch others playing games.

I also play a lot of classic games with my older one. We finished Streets of Rage 1/2 together.

HDRchampion · Sep 5, 2018

It was rough for us with our first child. My wife was working and going to school at the same time. I had long graveyard shifts & another job during the weekend. There really wasn't anytime for videogames then again i wasn't really playing games at that time. Getting more sleep was probably your number one craving to do, not games.

It made us grow up pretty fast and most of my unmarried friends kind of went separate ways. So we tried making new friends with kids but that didn't really last so we just kept to ourselves. Surprisingly a lot of people wanted to help with the baby, so make sure to take up on those offers so you can have some rest time with the wife even if its just a few hours.

Congrats man!

greedostick · Sep 5, 2018

Congratulations man!

I wish I was in your shoes right now. Must be exciting.

sylvie · Sep 5, 2018

you're doomed

nice knowing you, pussyfucker

lithy · Sep 5, 2018

Here is some advice.

1.) Always ask n-g.com for parenting advice. Forums never fail, it's a hive mind sort of thing.

2.) Don't read anything into the fact that you are soliciting advice on how a kid will affect your video game time. Your priorities are already in the right place.

neo_mao · Sep 5, 2018

Having a child is a great way to meet women!

Soon to be first time dad. HELP!

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