Quick story time: I have a buddy whose fiancee died in a horrible accident about 10 years ago. He was inconsolable for months (wouldn't leave the house, drank like a sailor on shore leave, lost his job... his family actually had to call the cops to do a welfare check at one point) and it took him a couple of years to truly pick up the pieces. Ended up doing therapy for a while but he said what he really needed was time to heal. To this day, he can't talk about it without getting emotional and he's always gonna have that scar but dude actually got married a couple of years ago and had his first kid earlier this year.
Anyway, point is I'm sure you've got a hundred people tripping over themselves trying to help you feel better but time is the only cure and you'll get there too if you don't give up and just let yourself grieve. Punish your liver. Create music. Yell at inanimate objects. Take long walks. Get a dog. Whatever helps you get through the day. Just know that this is as dark as it's gonna get. It WILL get better if you give it time.