Originally posted by Neon_Sonic:
<strong>FINALLY! An Evangelion topic I DIDN'T start. Yeah, I saw this a while ago. I can't believe what an idea the guy who wrote the following "review" is.
Here's the typo-filled article somebody copied down from NewType Magazine:
"Here it is (quoted from Newtype USA issue 1 pg 157)
Ah,EVANGELION DEATH AND REBIRTH, the harrowing "almost" conclusion to the epic EVA series that ended on a cryptically lame note. FOr the unininformed, EVANGELION takes place after an even called the "2nd Impact" which terminally inconveniened half the world (the 1st impact being the one that spanked the dinasaurs and gave us the platypus) and concerns a group called NERV and 14 year old rugrats who pilot lanky bio-mechs that contain the souls of their dead mammies against bizarro meanies known as "ANGELS"
EVANGELION has more biblical overtones, teen melo-drama and bad parenting than your average episode of EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND.The first par of this dvd "Death" is a cranial-enema-splicing edif of the whole confusing 600 minute long series into just 90 minutes. Then "Rebirth" begins.Here we have SEELE,an illuminati-type group that is only seen as a cirle of yapping digital dominoes,off to invade NERV to bring on the 3rd impact which will somehow turn the world into one symbiotic entity that is perfect in every way except it likes pork rinds and wears parachute pants. Our twerp of a hero Shinji hits puberty and has a 1st impact of his own after he begs Asuka to wake up and tell him how annoying he is. NERV gets overrun by peeved, underpaid commandos who like to charbroil over-paid NERV empolyees.Then Asuka, in her red Eva, gets ready to slam some enemy arse! Shinji curls his bony frame into a ball and gets depressed wondering why is voice irritates all. Then that's it kids,Gotta wait for...
Ah,END OF EVANGELION, the walling kinda-sorta conclusion, here we have SEELE, another illuminati type group that is seen only as a cirle of yapping digital dominoes, off to invade NERV in order to bring on the 3rd impact which will somehow turn the beginning of this dvd into the last 20 minutes of DEATH AND REBIRTH. HUh? That's right, the first 20 minutes of this movie is the last 20 minutes of DEATH AND REBIRTH. Sucka'! Just after your feeling of bamboozlement ebbs, the saga continues with Asuka mauling and neck snappin' a bunch of white Eva units.Her Eva unit then gets impaled...the white Evas eat it up like a Las Vegas buffet...end of Asuka. Rei gets big. Eva unit 1 turns into an intergalactic crufix...everybody dies.
Besides the opening credit lists all two jillion companies that threw scratch into these movies and a very corny intermission during DEATH AND REBIRTH, these two movies may confuse you, frustrate you amd make you beat small animals, or not. Manga Entertainment did a top notch job with the DVDs. Both have great menus, incredible sound and boring audio commentaries. Warning: for some frustrated viewers, these DVDs might bring on the "4th impact" hurling these dvds againts the wall. But Shinji, I dont' blame you, I blame your parents."</strong><hr></blockquote>
Tha was a crazy read!?!?!...I never found the story to be THAT complicated