Didn't know they could give morphine orally.
Usually doctors give morphine tablets orally, but I know a better way.
1. Get a 10ml syringe (without the needle), or buy a enema kit at a pharmacy/grocery store and use the syringe from it.
2. Get 40mg - 60mg of morphine tablets and crush them up into a super fine powder.
3. Get a small bowl (as small as possible) and measure out 15-20ml of warm (not hot/cool/cold, but warm) water and pour it into a bowl. The warm water helps convert some of the active alkaloids to become more absorbable.
4. Take the crushed pills and add it to the warm water.
5. Using a straw, coffee stirrer, etc, stir the solution a bit until it dissolves.
6. Once dissolved, stir the solution up again to make sure there isn't powder settled in the bottom, and while all the powder is all swirling around, quickly draw up the solution into your syringe.
7. If there is any air in the syringe, push it out. Not that it really matters, but it could cause some gastrointestinal discomfort/pressure.
8. Using a sex lubricant, lotion, petroleum jelly, etc, lubricate the entire syringe being sure to focus a lot of the tip of the syringe where a needle would normally go. There is no need to lubricate your butthole, but you can if you wish.
9. Go somewhere where you can be alone, and yet occupied, for instance, lying on your bed watching T.V, reading a book, playing neo geo, etc. Just be sure you're lying on your side, and have something to do for the next 25 minutes or so. I'll explain why in next step.
10. Take your pants and underwear off and lie on your side, slightly arching your back to cause your butt to stick out. Don't arch much, just barely.
11. Insert the syringe. If well lubricated this isn't painful in the least bit, just a tad uncomfortable is all. Slowly slide it up in there and avoid twisting it or wiggling it.
12. Continue to insert the syringe almost until it reaches the plunger part of the syringe. You pretty much need to get most of the syringe in there to get past your anus so it can get in your anal cavity where all the veins are.
13. Slowly squirt the solution in there. You will feel the warm water running down the inner 'walls' of your anal cavity and if you use warm water (which you should) it is kind of pleasant. (Might remind you of a favorite uncle.)
14. Once you've completely squirted the solution in there, slowly slide the syringe out.
15. Once you've pulled it out, remain on your side. Do not roll over, move, stand-up, or anything. Lay on that side for at least 25 minutes but to ensure it has completely absorbed, 35 minutes is recommended. This is why I suggested lying in front of a T.V., read a book, play SNK etc. so you can have something to do while you wait.
16. Once your waiting period is up, you may stand up.
Congratulations, you're done!
