The 2009 Official College Football Thread (post-season -- BIG 12 IMPLOSION!!!)

aria

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Mike Bellotti ditches the thankless role as Oregon's AD after less than a year and jumps aboard ESPN as a college football analyst.

haha, can't view it at work right now, but I'll check it out in a few hours.

Over 40000 more votes and his lead seems secure:

(1) NATALIE GULBIS
42% (43283 Votes)
(16) LANE KIFFIN
58% (58560 Votes)

EDSBS nailed it:
EDSBS said:
Duchess is still ahead of Natalie Gulbis thanks to your efforts. Keep it up, and we will see the ultimate showdown of Coach Moral Victory versus Helen Mirren in the final, and thus confirm that you should never hold a large open poll on the internet to determine anything. When elections are done this way, Goatse Man, Trololo Guy, and Courage Wolf will be your elected representatives. Chances are you will notice no difference in provisions of local service or their quality.

I caved in and bought the other 2 boxes along w/a Miami Dolphins. Riddle me this, sir.....what prizes can I expect in those cereals?

Florida: You get to sign Tim Tebow as a free agent :emb:
FSU: Either a can of Ensure, a free pair of Nikes, or some test answers :emb: :emb:
 

aria

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So Bobak and Vinh are actually both USC grads (about 6 years apart), so this can continue.

Lane Kiffin's fight to be the sexiest woman alive keeps on moving, with round 1 somehow still not done yet the lead holding with over 112,000 votes.

ESPN covered it on Sunday (also noting (16) Helen Mirren is wasting (1) Megan Fox by an even bigger margin with less votes).

Lane Kiffin is rolling with it, and left this Tweet:

 

aria

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Urban Meyer just took a shot at making his own Gundy-like "I'm a Man, I'm 40!" rant; only he seems to understand how "journalism" works even less.

http://espn.go.com/blog/sec/post/_/id/9748/so-much-for-meyer-easing-back-into-things

Video and the reporter in question's take is here:
http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/sp...te-thompson.html/comment-page-4#comment-14075

And EDSBS put it best:
Screen_shot_2010-03-25_at_11.58.41_AM.png
 

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I'm mad ESPN's SportsNation Colin Cowherd had the nerve to say if Urban doesn't like how the media works, he should go coach at Florida A&I (no school by that name exists at all) or Florida A&M or any other crappy school for $80K so he can be in obscurity.
 

aria

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I'm mad ESPN's SportsNation Colin Cowherd had the nerve to say if Urban doesn't like how the media works, he should go coach at Florida A&I (no school by that name exists at all) or Florida A&M or any other crappy school for $80K so he can be in obscurity.

That was a stupid thing to say (sports journalists, even good ones, often have a number of those), but I still couldn't help but think of a punchline:

Urban Meyer: Well, that's too bad, as I was actually planning to see if FAMU would be interested in hiring m---

HC: YES!!!
 

aria

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SEC Alignment chart:

DnD_SEC.jpg



Also, this made me laugh:

Remember the bit in 300 where the freaky transsexual Persians really decide to get serious, and begin emptying the bin full of freaks they've collected from the distant corners of their empire onto the outnumbered Spartans? That bin is known in college football as the Mississippi junior college system
 

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That was a stupid thing to say (sports journalists, even good ones, often have a number of those), but I still couldn't help but think of a punchline:

Urban Meyer: Well, that's too bad, as I was actually planning to see if FAMU would be interested in hiring m---

HC: YES!!!

I was actually pulling for Ron Zook when he got fired from UF back then, but he went to Illinois, so oh well.
 

aria

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Classic:

FROM: Dan Strakowsky, Senior VP, Analysis and Meme Development
TO: All ESPN College Football on-air talent
RE: Boise State coverage in 2010

All,

I'm sure you're as riveted as I was by the thrilling upsets that came to symbolize this year's NCAA men's basketball tournament, particularly Butler's surprise run to the championship game. I'm also sure many of you have considered the implications this has for our coverage of the 2010 college football season.

In case you don't know what I'm talking about, I'll spell it out for you: Boise State = Butler in 2010. We're in a unique situation here, folks -- Boise State may return as many as 21 starters from a team that went 14-0 and won the Fiesta Bowl last season. And right as pundits began seriously assessing whether the Broncos should be considered a legitimate candidate for the 2010 BCS National Championship Game, Butler went out there and presented a template -- albeit in another sport -- for how it could be done. You know I consider narratives to be as good as gold, so I hope you're all wearing cups, because fate has just dropped a gigantic Krugerrand right in our laps.

The following is a back-of-the-napkin outline of where I see our on-air talent fitting into this theme. Right now we're just talking about the flagship programming (College Gameday and College Football Live), but I want our announcing teams and ESPNU personalities to use this as a template for how they might strategize their own positions this season. If everybody finds a role and plays it to the hilt, nobody will be getting more mileage out of Boise State than the ABC/ESPN family of networks in 2010.

Star-divide

First up:

Chris Fowler, Rece Davis: The Mediators. Officially, you have no position on whether Boise State is worthy or unworthy of playing for the national title; your job is to manage the repartee between your co-hosts, stoke the fires, keep the debate moving. Never take sides -- anything you say about the Broncos, good or bad, should only be used as a way of eliciting a response from a co-host. For example, if one of them says BSU is a dead-solid lock to play in the BCS title game, you might use something like "Whoa! Bold prediction from so-and-so!" to tee his "opponent" up for a fiery response. On the other hand, if one of your co-hosts says that there's no way the Broncos can go undefeated for two straight regular seasons, remind them of Butler and give the other guy a chance to let loose. Some networks may view repeated use of the phrase "Butler did it" as trite and overdone; you know that's not how we roll here. Repetition is the spice of life. Just remember, the goal is to ensure that the debate is in no way won or settled before kickoff on January 10.

Desmond Howard, Lou Holtz: The Good Cops. Until Boise State loses a game, your job is to pump them up as a national-title contender for all they're worth. Desmond, since you've familiarized yourself about as well as anyone can with the workings of the BCS system, you'll be the guy to crunch numbers and talk about how Boise is still very much in the mix to finish #2 in the BCS rankings; Lou, since that's obviously way above your pay grade, you'll be the one to talk about "heart" and how bad they "want it" and how they feel disrespected about this thing or that thing. You know, all the intangibles that we relentlessly toss out there in spite of the fact that they mean next to nothing. Feel free to compare them to any of your Notre Dame teams as you see fit, but that's your call, Coach. Just pump up those Broncos and let the sun shine in!

Kirk Herbstreit, Mark May: The Bad Cops. It's a tough job, but somebody's gotta do it: You guys are the buzzkills. It's your job to tell the country why BSU does not belong in the national-title game. Don't criticize them as a team -- always be sure to throw them a patronizing bone about what a terrific coach Chris Petersen is and how they're great by mid-major standards -- but no way, nohow do you want them playing for the big one. Herbie, you're kind of our nice guy out there, so be sure to deliver the bad news with a spoonful of sugar when you can; May, you're our designated asshole. I want at least one eye-roll for every positive thing Holtz says about BSU, and any negative comparisons to, say, Southern Cal are also a plus. You're walking a tightrope here, fellas, but I'm confident you can pull it off.

Lee Corso: The Babbler. Your job is kind of similar to Fowler's -- to "not so fast" the other two at every opportunity. Probably be a good idea for Fowler to have a signal he can throw you when he needs some help there; you and he can work that out. But whenever you do that, be sure your analysis isn't backed up by any actual reasoning but is just pretty much stories from your Florida State days. People love that stuff.

One thing it's important to keep in mind: This action plan is only in effect for the regular season. Once Alabama kicks Boise's ass in the title game, everyone's editorial opinions shift to "Boise State wasn't worthy." During the regular season, though, feel free to go nuts, as all Web content and video archives will be scrubbed of any pro-BSU sentiment so as to make it look like we knew what was going to happen all along.

Announcers and ESPNU talent, I want a memo from each of you outlining which of these roles you want to take and how you're going to play it. We've got to keep the sides more or less equal, so I can't promise that everybody's going to get what they want, but I'll do my best.

I look forward to hearing your pitches -- let's do everything we can to keep 2010 meme-tastic!

DS



(dictated but not read)
 

aria

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Florida's Tim Tebow to be NCAA Football '11's Cover Boy

What, no love for Eric Berry, Dez Bryant, Golden Tate, JaCorey Harris, Brian Orakpo or even Bowden? Hell, just photoshop that LeGarrette Blount sucker punch onto the cover so you can cross promote NCAA and Fight Night.

Hmm... they dropped putting different people on different formats, eh?

He does carry on the tradition of Jared Zabransky as being a great future CFL QB on the cover... :emb:
 

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Hmm... they dropped putting different people on different formats, eh?

He does carry on the tradition of Jared Zabransky as being a great future CFL QB on the cover... :emb:

I'd take Rust Belt Tebow (Central Michigan's Dan LeFevour) over actual Tebow.
 

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UNC's Spring Game is on now and after a godawful hoops season, I can see why folks would want to latch on to anything that brings hope to Chapel Hill; Butch Davis is 2 or 3 key games away from making the Heels into a national spotlight team.
 

aria

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We should have our own show, HC. :)


---

So I want to first make clear that the recent death of the highly touted Irish recruit, regardless of his worth as an athlete, is a tragedy that I do not wish on any program (or, more importantly, parents and family).

But holy cow, this was almost one for the Darwin Awards... The kid was at a hotel for spring break with a bunch of his high school buddies, smack dab on the Redneck Riviera, drinking and partying and he leans out the balcony to flip off his buddies in the next balcony --and slips. Yup, that's how he died --being "drunk and belligerent" (as per the police report) and flipping the bird on his way to a date with Captain Pavement.
 

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We should have our own show, HC. :)


---

So I want to first make clear that the recent death of the highly touted Irish recruit, regardless of his worth as an athlete, is a tragedy that I do not wish on any program (or, more importantly, parents and family).

But holy cow, this was almost one for the Darwin Awards... The kid was at a hotel for spring break with a bunch of his high school buddies, smack dab on the Redneck Riviera, drinking and partying and he leans out the balcony to flip off his buddies in the next balcony --and slips. Yup, that's how he died --being "drunk and belligerent" (as per the police report) and flipping the bird on his way to a date with Captain Pavement.

Condolences to his parents, but he had no damn business drinking in the first place, but when has that ever stopped a reckless kid? What's even more ironic is the way he went out in hs is the way most college kids come to Panama City hoping to achieve in spirit.
 

aria

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Condolences to his parents, but he had no damn business drinking in the first place, but when has that ever stopped a reckless kid? What's even more ironic is the way he went out in hs is the way most college kids come to Panama City hoping to achieve in spirit.

Early achiever.
 

aria

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Video of Jerry Jones on Tim Tebow, The Tuna, and showing why you should probably see if the group of younger guys you're drinking has someone with a recording device:

http://deadspin.com/5516297/

----

Also, Arizona State has just signed a deal to play Texas... Well, Texas at San Antoni. UTSA is adding football this season with none other than Larry Coker at the helm, and they plan to fast-track from FCS-Independent to FBS whooping boy in time for the Sept. 17, 2016 game in the Alamo Dome (which will be UTSA's home stadium).

While UTSA won't be able to reach FBS until 2015, that won't stop the Wildcats --Arizona has decided to schedule a home-away-home with the Roadrunners for the 2013-15 seasons.

This is a great time to bring up that only three schools remain with true honor: Notre Dame, USC, and UCLA are the only teams left in FBS that have never played nor scheduled a future game with an FCS school or less (Washington falls victim to the latter...).
 

Hidden Character

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Video of Jerry Jones on Tim Tebow, The Tuna, and showing why you should probably see if the group of younger guys you're drinking has someone with a recording device:

http://deadspin.com/5516297/

----

Also, Arizona State has just signed a deal to play Texas... Well, Texas at San Antoni. UTSA is adding football this season with none other than Larry Coker at the helm, and they plan to fast-track from FCS-Independent to FBS whooping boy in time for the Sept. 17, 2016 game in the Alamo Dome (which will be UTSA's home stadium).

While UTSA won't be able to reach FBS until 2015, that won't stop the Wildcats --Arizona has decided to schedule a home-away-home with the Roadrunners for the 2013-15 seasons.

This is a great time to bring up that only three schools remain with true honor: Notre Dame, USC, and UCLA are the only teams left in FBS that have never played nor scheduled a future game with an FCS school or less (Washington falls victim to the latter...).

Not a bad logo:

Newrr.jpg


But I'm sure tons of fans down in San Anton will use this in their signs and unofficial spirit tees instead:

road-runner-1.jpg


Beep beep, UTSA.
 

aria

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Not a bad logo:

Newrr.jpg


But I'm sure tons of fans down in San Anton will use this in their signs and unofficial spirit tees instead:

road-runner-1.jpg


Beep beep, UTSA.

The 4-year school in my hometown, CSUB, is also the Roadrunners --and for a time it looked awfully close to the WB character.

Fun fact: because not many Pac-10 schools offer wrestling, CSUB is one of a half-dozen associate members in that sport. The most famous graduate? Stephen Neal, who trained for football after wrestling and ended up as a starter on the Patriots...getting three rings. I think he does MMA now.
 

aria

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This poor true freshman has been making runs like the ones starting at 0:47 all during the Spring, which has earned him the ominous and potentially burdensome title as "the next Reggie Bush" (just ask Joe McKnight).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8Wi9g-KVaw

Dillon Baxter

Remember that name.
 

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This billboard will be placed 20 mi. outside Tallahassee on I-10 and extra proceeds from donations will go to Gainesville Pet Rescue:

billboard1_medium.jpg



Even though I don't root for either, this is SO wrong.
 

aria

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