Games that left you wanting to never return

[max 330 megafartz]

Sage’s thread got me thinking about games i had as a kid that i just honestly hated everything about them. The world, the character, the gameplay, all of it.

Faxanadu- play the part of some sandal wearing faggot in sand land that gets attacked by ugly gargoyle dog things. God i hated this game as a kid, but when you are like 5 years old you think “hmm… maybe i will like it this time!” Only to be disappointed again at how totally aesthetically unappealing it was.

Second contender was that god damn game with Fabio on the cover. Ironsword wizards and warriors 2. Play the part of a retarded knight with a pot on his head who jumps and moves like a marionette doll in a world of stupid flying enemies trying to knock your gimp ass off of craggy platforms.

Glad i had not thought about either of these games in like 20 years.

 

[NeoSneth]

I can agree with wizards and warriors. I didn't understand it as a kid. Now that I know how to play, it's still stupid.

 

[Tarma]

Gradius / Nemesis - really hated that game when I first played it on the ZX Spectrum... couple of years later I got the NES cart for Xmas... that went straight back to the store and I got Rad Racer instead

Still don't like the Gradius series now. I think there are far better shmups out there.

 

[wataru330]

KoF XV.

Stupid auto scaling characters. A jarring gimmick that doesn’t fit in the flow of fast paced, high combo fighter. Stupid Unreal Engine middleware. Busted aesthetic and more cringe character designs. XIV is leagues better.

*yes-i realize SamSho 2019 has auto scaling. That gimmick *works* with a hack/slash…retreat…guard, parry-punish game flow.

 

[city41]

BurgerTime. As a young dumb kid the store didn't have the game I wanted, I saw BurgerTime and figured I'd get it instead. What a crappy game and it's just impossibly hard. No fun was ever had playing BurgerTime.

 

[Neo Alec]

I can agree with wizards and warriors. I didn't understand it as a kid. Now that I know how to play, it's still stupid.

Wizards. And warriors! With all the fun of falling down. Rare proves once again they are masters of programming the NES, and masters of irritating difficulty. Have fun with the rental, kids. Remember, Mom and Dad aren't going back to get you a different game this weekend.

 

[Moob Butter]

Luigi’s Mansion. I felt like it was a bore fest from start to finish. I did complete it, but only because as a kid I had just a few games to play at any time and I had a lot more tolerance to BS than I do now. I’ve had zero desire to replay it, or explore any of its sequels.

Gameplay was go to a room, hoover ghosts, get a key, look at map, go to that room, hoover ghosts, go back to a room you’ve already cleared, hoover more ghosts…

 

[Lagduf]

Wizards. And warriors! With all the fun of falling down. Rare proves once again they are masters of programming the NES, and masters of irritating difficulty. Have fun with the rental, kids. Remember, Mom and Dad aren't going back to get you a different game this weekend.

Man a lot of beloved 8-bit titles are just bad. They were bad then too. Crude, unresponsive controls, boring gameplay, etc. I suppose the barrier to making a game was so low. But it’s a stark contrast when looking at 8bit titles by the likes of say Nintendo and then by others. It’s a night and day difference. I also don’t understand the difficulty of some older titles. It’s like they still have the arcade, give me quarters, mentality. The difficulty is a barrier to increase playtime…but why? We already bought the game. I suppose good game development is hard.

I dunno. I find a lot of pre-SNES stuff to be unplayable.

 

[Ralfakick]

BurgerTime. As a young dumb kid the store didn't have the game I wanted, I saw BurgerTime and figured I'd get it instead. What a crappy game and it's just impossibly hard. No fun was ever had playing BurgerTime.

I have fond memories of it. Before I had an NES I had Burgertime for the Ti99/4a. I used to love playing it but yes it was hard.

 

[Taiso]

Deadly Towers

 

[Neo Alec]

Man a lot of beloved 8-bit titles are just bad. They were bad then too. Crude, unresponsive controls, boring gameplay, etc. I suppose the barrier to making a game was so low. But it’s a stark contrast when looking at 8bit titles by the likes of say Nintendo and then by others. It’s a night and day difference. I also don’t understand the difficulty of some older titles. It’s like they still have the arcade, give me quarters, mentality. The difficulty is a barrier to increase playtime…but why? We already bought the game. I suppose good game development is hard.

Yeah, I remember becoming wary as a kid renting NES games of anything that didn't have the Nintendo, Capcom or Konami logo on it. It was Russian roulette choosing a weekend rental if it was anything else. I missed out on some decent games just because they had the misfortune of being published with a less than reputable name on them in the US.

For example:

I'm lucky I stumbled on Guardian Legend and didn't miss out. It had the Broderbund name on it in the US, so it was a risk.

FCI was a publisher that should be avoided on the NES, but they published two good games from Compile.

Here are some mostly decent games developed by KID from all different publishers:

 

[Viewpoint]

Faxanadu- play the part of some sandal wearing faggot in sand land that gets attacked by ugly gargoyle dog things. God i hated this game as a kid, but when you are like 5 years old you think “hmm… maybe i will like it this time!” Only to be disappointed again at how totally aesthetically unappealing it was.

Here's a little fact that'll twist the knife even more about that game. There's an item you pick up further in that's supposed to raise your attack power to do more damage. However due to someone coding the game wrong by a single digit, the item lowers your attack down and makes it harder to kill enemies.

 

[douglas]

Timesplitters 2 - This is a frustrating one for me. On one hand, there are a lot of things I like about it: the graphics, the sound, the gunplay, the charm, the personality. But fuck man, where do I go? What do I do? I found myself more often than not looking up a walkthrough to get through these stages. I wanna shoot stuff! Not wander around looking for a key or some shit. I think this game suffers from that early fps design mentality of maze like stages that require a fucking sextant and a PHD in patience to get through. Same problem with the OG Doom games and Blood and all those ones. Just ruins 'em for me. And it's a crying shame too because of all the good qualities previously listed.

 

[StevenK]

Luigi’s Mansion. I felt like it was a bore fest from start to finish. I did complete it, but only because as a kid I had just a few games to play at any time and I had a lot more tolerance to BS than I do now. I’ve had zero desire to replay it, or explore any of its sequels.

Gameplay was go to a room, hoover ghosts, get a key, look at map, go to that room, hoover ghosts, go back to a room you’ve already cleared, hoover more ghosts…

I hadn't considered that some of you were kids when Luigi's mansion was released

 

[Moob Butter]

Timesplitters 2 - This is a frustrating one for me. On one hand, there are a lot of things I like about it: the graphics, the sound, the gunplay, the charm, the personality. But fuck man, where do I go? What do I do? I found myself more often than not looking up a walkthrough to get through these stages. I wanna shoot stuff! Not wander around looking for a key or some shit.

It’s not just me then.

I loved the simplicity of run and gun in TimeSplitters 1.

Adding Goldeneye/Perfect Dark style mission criteria spoiled the flow of the 2nd one for me. I never played the 3rd one.

I hadn't considered that some of you were kids when Luigi's mansion was released

2002 so I was 14. The reviews were so good as well. I think that’s when I realised the gaming press have a massive boner for anything with Nintendo’s name or characters in it, and they struggle to be objective.

 

[Tron]

Ironsword,i admit to enjoying wizards and warriors but i found trying to complete it's sequel rather frustrating.Beside it's bs final boss fight at the end of game i like to know what the hell rare was thinking with that design choice.

 

[BerryTogart]

The adventures of Captain Comic - our family did own a PC rather soon (286, EGA graphics) but boy was it hard to get my hands on some decent games for that platform as a kid. While Budokan kindled my love for 2D fighters I do not remember Captain Comic very fondly. Don't know if I was just too unskilled to play a jump and run with a keyboard or if it really wasn't a very high quality game.

 

[Gentlegamer]

Dragon Age Origins - it shipped with an in-game DLC Salesman

 

[Moob Butter]

Dragon Age Origins - it shipped with an in-game DLC Salesman

The rock fucker? I forgot about him.

 

[yagamikun]

Adventures of Lolo

While I'd eventually come around to Hal developed games later with Kirby and the like, Lolo turned me off completely. It wasn't so much the gameplay, but I remember as a kid being offput by the graphics and sound design - it felt unsettling in a way. I've returned to try it as an adult and it immediately left the same impression. I know these games are generally well liked, but I just can't jive with them.

Actually, when I got Kirby's Dreamland on Game Boy and got to destroy Lolo and Lala (one of the stage bosses), I felt vindicated. Almost like Hal realized that Lolo sucked and let you destroy him as penance.

 

[Neo Alec]

Adventures of Lolo

While I'd eventually come around to Hal developed games later with Kirby and the like, Lolo turned me off completely. It wasn't so much the gameplay, but I remember as a kid being offput by the graphics and sound design - it felt unsettling in a way. I've returned to try it as an adult and it immediately left the same impression. I know these games are generally well liked, but I just can't jive with them.

Actually, when I got Kirby's Dreamland on Game Boy and got to destroy Lolo and Lala (one of the stage bosses), I felt vindicated. Almost like Hal realized that Lolo sucked and let you destroy him as penance.

Interesting. Never got that feeling from Lolo. I enjoyed the game and its sequels as a kid, but the problem was they all became too hard to figure out too early, so the fun stopped there.

 

[Gentlegamer]

The rock fucker? I forgot about him

It was some jabroni that hangs out in your camp. He asked me to do a quest, and when I accepted, the XBL Marketplace purchase content window popped up asking for some Allards to buy the content.

I said FUCK THAT and shut the game off forever.

 

[city41]

Wizards. And warriors! With all the fun of falling down. Rare proves once again they are masters of programming the NES, and masters of irritating difficulty. Have fun with the rental, kids. Remember, Mom and Dad aren't going back to get you a different game this weekend.

W&W has infinite continues and you revived right where you died. So I had the opposite experience: my parents bought it for me and I "beat it" in a few hours. My Mom was absolutely furious.

 

[pixeljunkie]

Honestly, Last of Us. Great game, but I don't need a sequel or to ever play it again.

 

[Moob Butter]

It was some jabroni that hangs out in your camp. He asked me to do a quest, and when I accepted, the XBL Marketplace purchase content window popped up asking for some Allards to buy the content.

I said FUCK THAT and shut the game off forever.

Ah yes! This prick.

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