Basic Religion Test Stumps Many Americans [part 4281 in "Our Glorious Nation"]

HeartlessNinny

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Yes...I believe in Heaven...I just don't believe thats where I'm going when I die.

Really? Wow. I can honestly say I've never heard that one before.

Why not? It seems I have a lot more to learn about your beliefs than I thought.
 

zapatistab

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Really? Wow. I can honestly say I've never heard that one before.

Why not? It seems I have a lot more to learn about your beliefs than I thought.

In a nut shell since this thread can last forever.

What I believe and it's Bible based, not my personal opinion.

God created the earth.
Created Adam and Eve.
Paradise and humans living forever was God's original purpose.
They Sinned...thats why we die.
The first prophecy in Genesis.
The Seed (Jesus) will get bruised in the heal, but the seed will bruise him (Satan) in the head.
Instruction was given for our benefit and to learn lessons
Jesus was born
Preached
Then was killed on a Stake
Don't believe was crucified on a cross
Jesus went to Heaven

Ok...here's the stuff that makes people think we are crazy and a cult even though it's in the Bible

Satan was cast out of Heaven and now causes havoc on the earth...more so than he did in the past
He influences all badness...man still has free will
We never blame God for badness
When Armageddon comes
Satan will be locked up for 1000 years and the earth's restoration will begin
If I died before all this occurred then I will be resurrected not go to Heaven
The righteous and unrighteous will be resurrected and given a second chance
Once he's released everyone who takes his side will be gone and Satan will follow and be done away with forever
Satan will be thrown into a lake of fire (not a literal one on earth :D )
The prophecy in Genesis will be fulfilled
Those who die during Armageddon will not return
Everyone else will live forever on a paradise earth
The 144,000 will rule with Jesus in heaven and take care of the earth
God's original purpose

I left some out...but thats most of it.
JW's in a nutshell
 

SouthtownKid

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The prophecy in Genesis will be fulfilled
Those who die during Armageddon will not return
Everyone else will live forever on a paradise earth
The 144,000 will rule with Jesus in heaven and take care of the earth
God's original purpose
That sounds super and everything, but in the second 'original purpose' paradise, will there not be apples? Will there not be free will? What stops the entire cycle from beginning all over again?
 

Nesagwa

Beard of Zeus,
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So let me get this straight, you reject the "dogma of man" but latch onto interpretations of the old Testament as a metaphor for the birth of Jesus written in the Middle Ages?

Do you think the snake in the Garden was Satan too?
 

Nesagwa

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That sounds super and everything, but in the second 'original purpose' paradise, will there not be apples? Will there not be free will? What stops the entire cycle from beginning all over again?

Apples never mentioned in the Bible. Also a medieval construct.
 

zapatistab

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That sounds super and everything, but in the second 'original purpose' paradise, will there not be apples? Will there not be free will? What stops the entire cycle from beginning all over again?

apples...apples specifically were never mentioned

no one knows whats gonna happened after everything is fulfilled

All I know...if I'm reborn perfect, I'm gonna live my life and not mess it up...Satan won't be around to influence people anymore
 

HeartlessNinny

Heartlessness is a virtue
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In a nut shell since this thread can last forever.

What I believe and it's Bible based, not my personal opinion.

God created the earth.
Created Adam and Eve.
Paradise and humans living forever was God's original purpose.
They Sinned...thats why we die.
The first prophecy in Genesis.
The Seed (Jesus) will get bruised in the heal, but the seed will bruise him (Satan) in the head.
Instruction was given for our benefit and to learn lessons
Jesus was born
Preached
Then was killed on a Stake
Don't believe was crucified on a cross
Jesus went to Heaven

Ok...here's the stuff that makes people think we are crazy and a cult even though it's in the Bible

Satan was cast out of Heaven and now causes havoc on the earth...more so than he did in the past
He influences all badness...man still has free will
We never blame God for badness
When Armageddon comes
Satan will be locked up for 1000 years and the earth's restoration will begin
If I died before all this occurred then I will be resurrected not go to Heaven
The righteous and unrighteous will be resurrected and given a second chance
Once he's released everyone who takes his side will be gone and Satan will follow and be done away with forever
Satan will be thrown into a lake of fire (not a literal one on earth :D )
The prophecy in Genesis will be fulfilled
Those who die during Armageddon will not return
Everyone else will live forever on a paradise earth
The 144,000 will rule with Jesus in heaven and take care of the earth
God's original purpose

I left some out...but thats most of it.
JW's in a nutshell

Besides Nes's and STK's questions, what do you think will happen to you when you die, then? Is it 144,000 go to heaven and it's hell for everyone else, or is there a third option? If so, what is it? What is it supposed to be like? And what makes the 144,000 so special, anyway?
 

SML

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Besides Nes's and STK's questions, what do you think will happen to you when you die, then? Is it 144,000 go to heaven and it's hell for everyone else, or is there a third option? If so, what is it? What is it supposed to be like? And what makes the 144,000 so special, anyway?

Did you read his post carefully?
 

zapatistab

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So let me get this straight, you reject the "dogma of man" but latch onto interpretations of the old Testament as a metaphor for the birth of Jesus written in the Middle Ages?

Do you think the snake in the Garden was Satan too?

of course...the Bible called him a serpent
 

SouthtownKid

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apples...apples specifically were never mentioned

no one knows whats gonna happened after everything is fulfilled

All I know...if I'm reborn perfect, I'm gonna live my life and not mess it up...Satan won't be around to influence people anymore
It sounds like you are kind of waffling on the free will thing. If you mean people will be incapable of making bad choices because satan won't be influencing them, it makes it sound like free will was always illusory.
 

zapatistab

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Besides Nes's and STK's questions, what do you think will happen to you when you die, then? Is it 144,000 go to heaven and it's hell for everyone else, or is there a third option? If so, what is it? What is it supposed to be like? And what makes the 144,000 so special, anyway?

When I die...I'm dead...think of it as a deep sleep

No...no one is going to Hell

Whats makes the 144,000 so special...Chosen by God...I don't know...you will have to ask God.
 

SouthtownKid

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Besides Nes's and STK's questions, what do you think will happen to you when you die, then? Is it 144,000 go to heaven and it's hell for everyone else, or is there a third option? If so, what is it? What is it supposed to be like? And what makes the 144,000 so special, anyway?
He said the 144,000 go to heaven to help run things, kind of like a student government, while everyone else stays on the new earth and lives forever. This is something I hadn't been familiar with before, either. Lots I don't know about all the various sects' individual beliefs out there.

I was also interested in the reincarnation angle if you die before the apocalypse thing. Like they are mixing a pinch of Hinduism in there or something.
 

zapatistab

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It sounds like you are kind of waffling on the free will thing. If you mean people will be incapable of making bad choices because satan won't be influencing them, it makes it sound like free will was always illusory.

Your just upset because you want to do or be bad and you can't comprehend the idea of being good. :)
 

zapatistab

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He said the 144,000 go to heaven to help run things, kind of like a student government, while everyone else stays on the new earth and lives forever. This is something I hadn't been familiar with before, either. Lots I don't know about all the various sects' individual beliefs out there.

I was also interested in the reincarnation angle if you die before the apocalypse thing. Like they are mixing a pinch of Hinduism in there or something.

I was raised a Catholic and started attending various Christian Churches with my mom as a teenager...no one would study directly from the Bible with me...Pastors and Priests expected me to believe all their teaching (even though different from each other) and that pissed me off. (There is a scripture in the Bible encouraging us to question religious leaders - theirs nothing wrong with it)

I came across the Witnesses and everything I learned from the Bible contradicted what I was taught as a kid and a young adult...blew me away. Heaven, Hell, Idolatry, Spiritism...my family has been affected by certain spiritistic beliefs and lets say it's no joke. I feel like I am no longer in spiritual darkness and have a big weight off my shoulder...I sleep better at night and no longer fear Satan, but still know what he is capable of.

I am far from perfect and have guilty pleasures (videogames and neo-geo.com)
Sounds cheesey, but if what I am learning is false...at least I stay out of trouble and don't contribute to whats bad about this world.

I'm a family man who takes care of his own and when the crap hits the fan I won't let the Man and or Satan take me down.

The fact that Witnesses don't get paid to preach also attracted me to them. Our Elders who have nice cars don't pay them off with church member donations. They have jobs or are old retired men. Our traveling overseers get help with room and board, but don't get a check for preaching.
 

ki_atsushi

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Ok, I see some major differences in the way JW's believe here.

zapistab said:
God created the earth.
Created Adam and Eve.
Paradise and humans living forever was God's original purpose.
They Sinned...thats why we die.
The first prophecy in Genesis.
The Seed (Jesus) will get bruised in the heal, but the seed will bruise him (Satan) in the head.
Instruction was given for our benefit and to learn lessons
Jesus was born
Preached
Then was killed on a Stake

I was with you until here. Why do people make up stuff when it is clearly explained in the Bible? Crucifixion was a common form of Roman capital punishment. Where did the stake idea come from?

Don't believe was crucified on a cross
Jesus went to Heaven

You missed the part where Jesus spent 3 days in the heart of the earth ministering to the righteous who were held there until his arrival. Then he was resurrected after 3 days and ascended into heaven.

Ok...here's the stuff that makes people think we are crazy and a cult even though it's in the Bible

Satan was cast out of Heaven and now causes havoc on the earth...more so than he did in the past
He influences all badness...man still has free will
We never blame God for badness
When Armageddon comes
Satan will be locked up for 1000 years and the earth's restoration will begin

Ok, you're doing good here until...

If I died before all this occurred then I will be resurrected not go to Heaven
The righteous and unrighteous will be resurrected and given a second chance
Once he's released everyone who takes his side will be gone and Satan will follow and be done away with forever
Satan will be thrown into a lake of fire (not a literal one on earth )
The prophecy in Genesis will be fulfilled
Those who die during Armageddon will not return
Everyone else will live forever on a paradise earth
The 144,000 will rule with Jesus in heaven and take care of the earth
God's original purpose

Ok, first of all, the 144,000 that are mentioned in the Bible are clearly identified as Jews who will be 'sealed' until the end, to witness to the world of God's impending return.

The surviving righteous people of the 'end times' will be part of the Millennial Kingdom. The believers will not be resurrected in their old bodies, but will be granted new bodies... like Jesus had when he was resurrected (walking through walls, instantaneous travel, etc. :p ). The believers will help rule in the Millennial Kingdom.

The Earth is not the final disposition of man. After the 1,000 years and Satan and the final group of unrighteous people are finally dealt with, a New Jerusalem will be constructed after the old universe 'burns with a fervent heat'.

The 'Lake of Fire' is Satan's & the fallen angels final disposition, and 'outer darkness' is reserved for the unrighteous, where 'there is much weeping and gnashing of teeth', and 'the canker worm dieth not'.

It's unfortunate at how much division there is on God's word.

Yeah, these guys are going to think we're crazy.
 
Last edited:

SML

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Ok, I see some major differences in the way JW's believe here.



I was with you until here.

*snip*

Pro wrestling doesn't have as many shifting alliances as this thread.
 

evil wasabi

The Jongmaster
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aw man, what a fun post from ki_atsushi, as he laid the holy smack down.
 

ki_atsushi

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Pro wrestling doesn't have as many shifting alliances as this thread.

As I said in my post, it's a shame there's so much division between people on God's word. Nothing against Zapistab personally, I just wanted to contrast what I believe with him.

I don't believe the Bible is allegorical, except where obviously so. It explains itself.
 
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