neobuyer
Master of Disguise,
- Joined
- Oct 7, 2000
- Posts
- 8,083
Rarehero: “What is your name, your designation- your purpose, SOLDIER?!?”
MercBotX99: ” Mercenary-Automaton, Designation: X99 Cyborg-Superior, My purpose is to perform frontline assault on an independent basis, sans support forces.”
Rarehero: “And have you got the guts, oh last child of the Lone Star? Have you the will to perform your duties with maximum prejudice?”
MercBotX99: “I am the lordly conflagration of shadow that drowns the light at noon, the nigh-improbable breach in the enemy’s supposedly invulnerable defense. I am Gotterdammerung incarnate. Mercenary in name only- I am MX99- Storm King Tyrannosaurus Missile of Annihilation!”
Rarehero: “Excellent, it would seem even my work was worth the endless hours of toil. Now, my inviolate and rebuilt friend, why are you here- and what are all of us idealist fools trying to accomplish?”
MercBotX99: “My current, fortified form is largely the brainchild of Jeffroi Mannfred Kurtz, Lead Engineer of the resistance, skill-fingered god of those who seek after the lost path of Tesla and Edison.”
(SUDDENLY THE GHOST OF THE LATE CLINT GORMAN MATERIALIZES, INTERESTED IN THE SCENE…)
GormanGhost: “Ummmmm, this is kinda formal isn’t it? I don’t have all eternity here y’know- oh wait! I suppose I do. But regardless, I don’t know where the two of you got the silver tongues- bu start talking in a more colloquial manner or I’ma puke my ghostly guts all over the both of you!”
Rarehero: “It’s having had neobuyer around here- talking shit- that did it, I’m not even aware I’m talking this way half the damn time.”
MercBotX99: “Ugh, neobuyer… soft and slippery, not like a warrior at all ha haaaarrrr, …soft and slippery, guhhhhhh, like my big…”
(A SUDDEN PANIC FILLS RAREHERO’S FACE…)
Rarehero: “NO! Anti-Chub Protocol Minus 10 ½!!!”
GormanGhost: “Wow, I thought his shorts were growing an alligator tail! How’d you do that?”
Rarehero: “Post-hypnorobotic suggestion. TRUST ME, it’s been LONG in development, no pun intended, haha.”
GormanGhost: “Ha, yeah, I mean I wouldn’t want to actually see the thing once it sprung loose of his jock strap! Ewwwwww, ha, what a freak out that’d be if y….”
Rarehero: “Listen, being dead all these years has at least spared you a couple of things, Clint. That cyber-dick pops out about 10 times a day- more if there are catalogs with underwear models in them- or God forbid actual pornography. I’ve been ‘sprayed’ more times than I can think of without getting the shudders. (***shudders***)”
GomanGhost: “Oh, sorry to hear that Ed….. I always thought ALL the things I missed out on by dying young were rewarding and fun. Hey- did having that stuff all over you make you feel gay or anythi…”
Rarehero: “Shut. Up. Don’t go there, just let me forget it already. The guy’s got an unbelievable tsunami reservoir of molten-babies in what’s left of his organic scrotum, Clint. Ever go to Seaworld? Where the big whale jumps out of the water and flops down right next to the big plexiglass wall in front of all the people? And then the people in front get showered with hundreds of gallons of….”
GormanGhost: “Bllaaaarrrrrggggggggg….” (Ghost vomit)
W.I.P.
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That whole episode sounds VERY messy. Not sure I'd want to be around all that (even in Comic World). I'm wondering what I'm doing right about now in Shito Stains though. I seem to remember having this Cock Like Desert Assault Vehicle and going insane. I got shot through the head but was "supposed" to regenerate? 
