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Thread: NG.COM NEWS ALERT: white smoke sighted!

  1. #26
    Kraut Mod Takumaji's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jro
    I would like to request appointment as one of the eight remaining Cardinals. Why am I uniquely qualified for this position, you ask? Because in addition to my promise to never, ever fool Neo-Pope Kawasaki II, I volunteer to act as Enforcer-Cardinal. I will be the first Cardinal in history, Neo, Catholic, or otherwise, to wear a black hood-style executioner's mask as part of my daily attire. I will carry the Large Knife of Castration, for serious cases in which we must assure that the offender will not be allowed to procreate and no amount of absolution will suffice (cough *freelancer* cough), and I will also gladly administer the Public Spankings in the event that N-PKII prefers not to sully his holy hands on the backsides of the Confessors.

    I may even be willing to host candle parties at which other Cardinals and prospective future Popes will be able to buy black candles to be given to Confessors should they be instructed to insert said candles into their anuses and then go shopping.

    I also will buy if someone else flies upon the end of our beer and subs reserves.

    So do I get the gig?
    Enforcer-Cardinal... sounds good, you're in!

    You can assign up to two secretaries if you want. If they look good, you're requested to bring them to our weekly, uhm, 'meetings' to give them their bukka.#@%..official introduction.

    Good thinking with the candle selling. On one of our next meetings I'll introduce you to Shawn M. who has a video game store and also is into black candle manufacturing, his new model "papal double penetration" really is something other than else... Maybe you could setup some sort of deal with him...

    Bobak, I'm delighted to hear the heretic is gone, he already was scaring the herd. Hope my Zombie powder was of any use for you, I bought it from the Necro store and really paid an arm and a leg for it.

    Oh and let's not forget about our neo-pope calender project with a new pic of bishounen boys and shemales every month... when Bobak was finished strip-searching me after my election, I saw Mushiki dressed in a transparent nighty, sitting on the floor of the search room while he was nibbling on PSP dust covers, he would make a good "February boy" I guess. Any suggestions here?
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  2. #27
    . kernow's Avatar
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    freelancer.banned = true?

  3. #28
    Charles Barkley Amano Jacu's Avatar
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    icon35.gif

    Quote Originally Posted by Bobak
    He has been eliminated, my Lord.
    If only Pilatus had been like you instead of washing his hands...

  4. #29
    . Magnaflux's Avatar
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    Will you endorse my "Pope on a rope™" idea?

  5. #30
    Cham Cham's Banana
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    lol

    maybe white smoke will appear when people start getting their neo store orders
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  6. #31
    HEEEY jro's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kernow
    freelancer.banned = true?
    Yes, good Kernow, it is true. When the white smoke wafted through the sunlight that is Neo-Geo.com, it was clear that miracles would appear in short order, and this was the first (or second, if you really hated Eric Straven for some reason or other). The heretic is no longer among us and it is good. He would have been a waste of perfectly good black candles had we tried that method of absolution, but I was only able to snip off one of his unholy testicles with the Great Knife of Castration before he was cast down. Now, he might be referred to as "Pac-lancer."

    Quote Originally Posted by Takumaji
    Enforcer-Cardinal... sounds good, you're in!

    You can assign up to two secretaries if you want. If they look good, you're requested to bring them to our weekly, uhm, 'meetings' to give them their bukka.#@%..official introduction.

    Good thinking with the candle selling. On one of our next meetings I'll introduce you to Shawn M. who has a video game store and also is into black candle manufacturing, his new model "papal double penetration" really is something other than else... Maybe you could setup some sort of deal with him...

    Bobak, I'm delighted to hear the heretic is gone, he already was scaring the herd. Hope my Zombie powder was of any use for you, I bought it from the Necro store and really paid an arm and a leg for it.

    Oh and let's not forget about our neo-pope calender project with a new pic of bishounen boys and shemales every month... when Bobak was finished strip-searching me after my election, I saw Mushiki dressed in a transparent nighty, sitting on the floor of the search room while he was nibbling on PSP dust covers, he would make a good "February boy" I guess. Any suggestions here?
    I will place want-ads in Cardinal Weekly for my two secretaries. Provisions will include the following: strong familiarity with Neo doctrine, bra size of 34 C, a general willingness to be the object of bukkake upon command by either me or Neo-Pope Kawasaki II, and strict adherence to a policy of using whatever cleaning agent is necessary to remove "stains" from secretarial wear. Ugly hoes need not apply. Wait, that last part wasn't very Cardinal-like, maybe I'll leave that out of the ad.

    I would be pleased to enter into a business venture with Mr. M. I also hope that he will become a regular at my candle parties. I'm sure his PDP model will be quite a hit with all my regulars who are looking for something new in redemptive sodomy.

    If Mushiki is Mr. February, who is Mr. January? I will assume that Mr. Jan. is none other than Abasuto, to try and balance out the she-males with the boys?

    I must run some errands now before I settle in at the Neo-Vatican for the evening. I am planning to work out at the gym a bit, in my robes, my Cardinal hat, and my executioner's hood, of course, to make sure that my spanking skills are up to snuff, and then I will stop at the hunting knife store at the mall so that I can add a smaller, sidearm-type knife to the Great Knife of Castration, in order to be sure that I will avoid mistakes of the one-nut-chopping variety in the case of heretic freelancer.

    I will bring tidings of malt beverages when I arrive.

  7. #32
    Pao Pao Cafe Waiter

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    Are there any plans by Kawasaki II to investigate the allegations of pedophilia by Shito?
    email me at john dot boyce dot roche at gmail dot com if my inbox is full (substitute the appropriate symbols as appropriate)

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  8. #33
    Leader of The Hyperstone Heist
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    Does the Neo-Pope stand a chance against the Turrican Army? I hear their numbers are quite large and can be a menacing group.
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