Printable View
what would you do in your country?
I thought about it and first thing I'd do is ban Phil Collins and the musical group Genesis.
Anybody owning an mp3 or album would get a mandatory 72 hours in jail.
Playing the musin outloud for others to hear equals a weeks jail time and broadcasting over the airwaves would land you three months federal time.
Phil Colins is great.
You'd be banned from my country buster.
Step down.
I think lithy just won the thread.Quote:
Originally Posted by lithy
~Replace the IRS with a national Fair Tax.
~Remove any Governmental ties to "marriage" (it would thus become nothing more than a title some church or other group gave you, ). Everyone's legal ties would be "Civil Unions" with equal rights for same or different sex unions.
~Legalize marjiuana; harder drugs (coke, heroin, meth..etc.) would no longer impose fines or jail. Rehab only for user offenders.
~Constitutional amend to make abortion legal. I consider anti-abortion the government's attempted control over women's civil liberties.
~National insurance provided to low income citizens via sliding scale. IE...make under 16k, it's free. Make 16.1k-19k you pay 25% towards coverage...etc (like in Mass).
~250 billion reduction in our offensive military budget. Full immediate withdrawl from Iraq.
~Removal of all foreign aid (especially to Israel). Aid would be voted on and given in extreme situations (ie...tsunami, quake..etc.). Given just to help after an event, not regular pay.
~Removal of hate crime laws, FCC and all Federal ties to Public Education.
~Zero government money given to any private business ever.
~Leave the UN
~Begin oil drilling in Alaska
we need to continue using other peoples oil supplies.Quote:
Originally Posted by Abasuto
when they run out,
we win.
This pretty well sums it up for me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zs0YPN9Qqbk
Hmmmmm
-Can't reproduce unless you have a high enough IQ
-Can't reproduce unless you have an acceptable appearance
-Can't have more than 2 kids
-Legalize all drugs (if it's legal is won't be so "cool" anymore)
That about sums it up XD
I wouldn't be dictator unless it could be of the entire world, so if we're not talking about that, don't waste my time.
For me, the ideal dictator would be someone like Drax from the movie, Moonraker, who could implement a plan to humanely kill off 95% of the human population without doing any harm to the planet or the planet's animal and plant life. The only places I think his plan could stand to be improved would be to have the surviving 5% be chosen randomly rather than hand-picked, and of course the dictator who implemented the plan would have to show the courage of his convictions by joining the 95% who would die.
Did somebody say Dick-Tater?
http://img145.imageshack.us/img145/681/dicktater.jpg
lolskate :lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Phyeir
I'm german, so I wouldn't invade other countries because everyone would expect that a german dictator would try to take over the world^^
Beat me to it, you bastard!Quote:
Originally Posted by lithy
My first reply always to "what would you do if you were king/ruler of the world for a day" is that I would abdicate the throne.
:mad::mad::mad:Quote:
Originally Posted by Xavier
I like Phil I have you know. :shame:
Quote:
Originally Posted by rarehero
http://dic.academic.ru/pictures/enwiki/66/Buster.jpg
I would declare war to every nation, and bomb them with nuclear power! Yes, Mad Max would be a reality!
Demand all AES carts be sent to my compound so I could confiscate them, and make some mandatory laws:
All attractive women must walk around topless.
If you are a lesbian, you must not be a BullDyke.
*Addendum to Lesbian Law: - Both women in the lesbian relationship must be attractive. None of this Portia De Rossi dating Ellen type relationships crap.
Get rid of money.
it's like we're long lost brothers.Quote:
Originally Posted by kernow
you talk like these lesbians would have anything to do with you.Quote:
Originally Posted by payment_due
your nation would be chock full of fail.
All beer shall be imported....especially Lapin Kulta from Finland.
I'd ban all lawyers, no more legal pokemon battles. People are gonna have to represent themselves! :D
Waiters would also no longer receive tips at restaurants. It's so annoying to have to bribe the employees to give you good service. Isn't that their job? The concept of gratuities is henceforth banned.
All who oppose me will work in the salt mines.
Eugenics.... Because evolution is too slow and Democrats have put an end to natural selection as far as humans go.
No more will we let the masses drag us down to their level. No more will we protect people from themselves. No more warning hot coffee is served hot, no more this cape won't let you fly. No, we are done with all that.
Because when you protect the useless, worthles, and stupid from themselves, they are able to survive and breed. Without natural selection to control their numbers the few become many. Because with all their faults, flaws, and inabilities, the one thing they can do is reproduce and in staggering numbers. When you combine this with a democratic system where you give these lesser humans equal rights it is only a matter of time until things degrade beyond repair. Because these morons breed and breed and breed, and all of them have the right to vote, and as their numbers grow so grows their influence, or rather the power of those who can influence them. Before long they start to bring down the average level of intelligence of the population and the world starts being "Dumbed Down". In a scociety where the majority rule, the minority, the lessers, the useless need only breed themselves into a position of numbers and then they can influence change.
Because all men are not created equal.
Beware the beast Man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone among God's primates, he kills for sport or lust or greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him; drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of death.
Fascinating sermon, Doctor Zaius.Quote:
Originally Posted by joeaverage
http://lalengua.info/wp-content/uplo...dr-zaius2a.jpg
THUS SPEAKS THE LAWGIVER.
you talk like I expect gay women to sleep with me. The nation would be chock full of topless lesbians.Quote:
Originally Posted by rarehero
Sorry, but that's not fail.
I'm sure you would, as dictator, get kicked out by all the topless lesbians.Quote:
Originally Posted by payment_due
and then get your ass kicked by all your fellow exiled "bulldyke" lesbians.
(fail)
Given how vehemently I disagree with you on so many topics, Abs, I'm a bit surprised how many of these I agree with. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Abasuto
Good stuff from joeaverage, agreed 100%
Great thread, if I get liquored up tonight I'll return to spam some more.
If for political as much as safety reasons.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lagduf
Dictator's have a terrible life expectancy.
I'd take over the Car Industry.
Then I'd take over the Banks.
Then I'd take over Health Care.
Then I'd go on a tour around the world and apologize for everything my country may or may not have done.
Then I'd destroy all the records of all the crimes the last dictator and his friends commited
First thing I would do is ban all shitty media. Shitty movies, shitty music and shitty games. My country would only know quality and if they travelled abroad they would be apalled at how people can be entertained by such shittiness.
I'm down if this includes a Ministry of Re-Education that includes compulsory VF training.Quote:
Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X
:buttrock::buttrock::buttrock::buttrock::buttrock: :buttrock::buttrock::buttrock::buttrock::buttrock: :buttrock::buttrock::buttrock::buttrock::buttrock: :buttrock::buttrock: <- Spinrovia VF team!Quote:
Originally Posted by Loopz
Yes VF training is part of the education system. Basically in the totalitarian country of Spinrovia, you are obliged to be a licensed "Qualitician" as I call it. While you are in school you will have lessons in all things of quality and if you pass the National Exam you are rewarded with a "Certified Qualitician Card". The only way you can buy videogames if you have videgame privelages on your card. Also in order to play at the arcade(which are at every other stoplight throughout the country) you have to swipe your card. So if you don't have vg privelages on your card all you can do is watch.Quote:
Originally Posted by Loopz
Those who can't pass the National Exams are forced to be spectators in all things of quality which gives them motivation to understand quality better so they can partake in all of the festivities.
Tourists can apply for "Temp" Qualitician cards when they pass through customs at the airport.
p.s. House raids are performed monthly to locate stray copies of 50 cent games, Def Jam games, Mortal Kombat games, Rap CD's after 1999 and Emo music. There are DIRE consequences if said material is found.
I would pass a law that all political news be set to Auto-tune:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Psfn6iOfS8
I sure hope the U.S.A. never has to deal with this.Quote:
Originally Posted by norton9478
:cool:
Not even MK2? :(Quote:
Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X
our entire entertainment infrastructure is built upon bad media.Quote:
Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X
what would happen if micheal bay couldn't give the world transformers 2.
:(
The first born of Egypt would not have to die.Quote:
Originally Posted by rarehero
Sign me up.Quote:
Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X
Ok that's an exception.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hidden Character
my country would be an importer of media not a maker. So if it's shitty we wouldn't know about it.Quote:
Originally Posted by rarehero
So would Michael Bay be allowed in your country or not?Quote:
Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X
nope.Quote:
Originally Posted by J. Max
The Ministry of Artistic Purity would find him abroad and engage in acts of rendition against him and Joel Schumacher. They would be taken to a secret camp and detained indefinitely.Quote:
Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X
Someone once called me a quote, "Libertarian with a brain and heart".Quote:
Originally Posted by HeartlessNinny
I guess my views reflect that. While I do want the government small and given little authority, I stray from most Libertarians on a few things. One of which is healthcare.
I'm not for a single-payer universal healthcare simply because our government has never run any program worth a shit, they'd fuck up healthcare so bad people would be praying for disease. However, I do feel helping to provide insurance to the lower and middle-lower class is a worthy use of tax payer money.
Our current "welfare" system is either you get it or you don't. I believe in a sliding scale of you putting towards it based on income. It's unfair to someone making $5 above the minimum income to get nothing when that person making $5 less gets shit for free.
We'd still have welfare if I ran things, but it would be ran very different. Amongst other changes, anyone driving a fucking $60,000 car then expecting welfare help would collect nothing.Nothing pisses me off worse than having someone in front me in line using WIC and food stamps, then I notice them in the parking lot leaving in a new Escalade or Mercedes.
We would send the army to kill you before you could.Quote:
Originally Posted by deccer
:vik:
Sorry, I don't have a potato on the end of my dick.
First off I would destroy all media, the only from of comunications would be used for the dictatorship dealings.
I would setup camps to evaluate the value of all citizens and treat them accordingly. Everyone will work for the benefit of the Nation, any selfindulgent prick will face deathrow.
There would be no Jail, all criminals would be executed. If there is a miscrepancy finding one guilty, it will only serve as to instigate fear to all those who even think of breaking the law or simply act against the betterment of the land.
There would be healthcare provided to all and there will be education provided to all. I would enforce some elements of communism and socialism in order to maintain evryone under the same status as to avoid class segregation and so on.
There would be no religion, and this would be enforce with zero tolerance, if you don't like it you're free to leave but if you choose to stay you either abide by the law or die.
...and last but no least, there would be no monetary exchange, everything will be done under a program of exchange of equal living.
I would attack Endor
eradicate the Wookiees
assassinate all Jedi
impose martian law on Cloud City.
i would legalize prostitution, then regulate the pricing to make it affordable:mr_t:
I would take a nap.
"Ministry of Artistic Purity". I like that hehe.Quote:
Originally Posted by Loopz