This summer, God Exists at the Box Office

Or some reasonable divine influence has led movie-goers to actually skip all the certifiable crap at the movies. The two movies that I hoped would fail miserably have:

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"Stealth," about Navy pilots (Josh Lucas, Jessica Biel and Jamie Foxx) taking on a rogue drone plane, crashed and burned, finishing at No. 4 with $13.5 million. With an estimated $100 million production budget, "Stealth" will prove a costly money-loser for distributor Sony.

[. . .]

"Stealth," directed by Rob Cohen ("The Fast and the Furious"), was the second-straight flick from an established action director to flop. "The Island" from director Michael Bay ("Armageddon"), tanked a week earlier.

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I think Fantastic Four didn't quite meet up to B.O. expectations, so maybe I can celebrate a trifecta...

wow, it's captain obvious everyone. :oh_no:

http://www.captain-america.us/images...-vs-hitler.jpg



FREEDOM PREVAILS!!!

I like planes ad explosions for a visual film, but Stealth just reeks of pure shit from the advertising.

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Originally Posted by Baseley09

I like planes ad explosions for a visual film, but Stealth just reeks of pure shit from the advertising.

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I got nothing against action, just crap ;)

Same as you.

Awesome fake poster website, Hecker:

http://www.captain-america.us/images...in-america.jpg

Sure, often i think action titles, or movies of similar ilk, get bad rep, press or often overlooked by critique for not being highbrow enough......

Which is often rediculous, what they offer is a different experience, and although shamefuly i don't hold the general public at large in a high esteeme, like you say, people are aware when shit is shit a lot of the time.

I wanted stealth to tank so bad. I work on fighter jets and when me and my buddies saw the previews we laughed our asses off. Any movies involving Fighter Jets is just destined to be all wrong and lame.

Stealth pisses me off for the particular reason that Jamie Foxx felt compelled to go from Oscar-winning role to B-movie-caliber role alongside 7th Heaven Actress. Oh, and it looks like pure shit, too. Cohen should just die and spare us all.

Seeing Michael Bay fail miserably is even better, though. He sucks bad enough when Bruckheimer is around to rein him in a tiny bit, then when he goes off on his own everything REALLY goes to hell.

Yep, seeing those two flop is pretty sweet. Now if Rob Zombie makes enough off Devil's Rejects to really establish himself as a legit director I'll smile all the way until next movie season.

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Originally Posted by jro

Seeing Michael Bay fail miserably is even better, though. He sucks bad enough when Bruckheimer is around to rein him in a tiny bit, then when he goes off on his own everything REALLY goes to hell.

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too bad he's doing the transformers movie at current...

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Originally Posted by DashK

too bad he's doing the transformers movie at current...

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Which is going to suck out loud.

So the bottom line is that Jerry Bruckheimer, Michael Bay, Rob Cohen, and any other action schlep thinks that the American public is as dumb as dirt by just doing nothing more than adding caffeine to the movie water and selling it as "blockbuster".

LOL.... no wonder all the news reports about going to the movies is a waste of time is so common now. At least we have Pixar and Dreamworks... Spielberg is a crapshoot, James Cameron... WTF is he doing nowadays, probably another lovie dovie flick.

Also seems a trend that big names are moving to TV (directors, producers, and actors) as of late. Bruckheimer has for years with that boring ass show series CSI and its lame iterations. Guess with people's increasingly longer workload more and more are just plain too tired to care to drag the whole family out to the movies for $50.

DVD sales are booming, and if that's not your fancy, then all you need is a Netflix subscription and see'em on your huge 16:9 TV's that everybody is buying nowadays.

Imagine fellas when movie theaters will be a thing of the past? It'll be sad but funny at the same time.

Am I the only one semi-interested in the Dukes of Hazzard flick? :loco:

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Originally Posted by ferrarimanf355

Am I the only one semi-interested in the Dukes of Hazzard flick? :loco:

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Yup, you are the only one. I guess seeing Jessica Simpson might be the only reason but she is not my bag...

It's going to be very important for the audience to give a damn about the Duke family imo. The television show was done in a respectful clean way that gave it it's appeal imo. I mean, it managed to ditch the dirty,sleazy, red neck ,"country boy" sterotype.
-BB

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Originally Posted by Electroman

LOL.... no wonder all the news reports about going to the movies is a waste of time is so common now. At least we have Pixar and Dreamworks... Spielberg is a crapshoot, James Cameron... WTF is he doing nowadays, probably another lovie dovie flick.

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Isn't he doing that live-action Battle Angel film?

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Originally Posted by Lastblade

Yup, you are the only one.

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Re-emphasized for truth.

I remember reading something on cnn.com a little while back that said that the original actors read the script and hated it so much that they publicly asked all the fans of the original show to avoid the movie. They pointed out that the tv show was family-friendly, while the new version contains far too much profanity and innuendo for their show's standards.

Plus I'd say it just pretty much looks terrible. Your movie is in trouble when Johnny Knoxville and Jessica Simpson make up 2/3 of its stars. And then when Sean William Scott is that last 1/3, whew.

They say you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover but in the case of Stealth i think the trailer was enough for anyone to handle.

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Originally Posted by jro

Re-emphasized for truth.

I remember reading something on cnn.com a little while back that said that the original actors read the script and hated it so much that they publicly asked all the fans of the original show to avoid the movie. They pointed out that the tv show was family-friendly, while the new version contains far too much profanity and innuendo for their show's standards.

Plus I'd say it just pretty much looks terrible. Your movie is in trouble when Johnny Knoxville and Jessica Simpson make up 2/3 of its stars. And then when Sean William Scott is that last 1/3, whew.

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I think it's just Cooter who has issues with the movie.

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Originally Posted by jro

Plus I'd say it just pretty much looks terrible. Your movie is in trouble when Johnny Knoxville and Jessica Simpson make up 2/3 of its stars. And then when Sean William Scott is that last 1/3, whew.

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Jessica Simpson is one of the 3 stars; the other two are Right and Left.

But I don't need to see that movie when the special edition of Alexander is being released on DVD. :buttrock:

Well I'm damn glad both films (Stealth & The Island) flopped too. Both looked like complete ass and nothing is more insulting than a military action aviator film that doesn't use real planes. I'd have rather the movie gone the TOP GUN route and used F-22 Raptors and F-117s and then included the C.G. jet fighter from the film... but with a much better script than ripping off and fusing Macross Plus & YukeKaze Japanimation shows.

Thus Hollywood gets what they deserve with all of the bootlegging going on and ppl generally not giving a flying fuck about going to the cinema. They're largely depending on the pre teens and teens to go see their craptastic films at least 3 times out of sheer boredom, and even they aren't pumped up about it all. Guess Hollywood can't take the hint. Don't see why they don't just start releasing their films online as well as on DVD the same night they are released in Cinemas. Give the people the choice in how they wish to view it. With action movies being crap now we really need the old vibe of the 70's Blackploitation films and Golan Globus Productions of the early 80's. Gymkata II anyone?

GK

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Originally Posted by SPINMASTER X

Any movies involving Fighter Jets is just destined to be all wrong and lame.

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TOP GUN

TRUTH: Navy Pilots>Air Force Pilots.

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Originally Posted by ferrarimanf355

Isn't he doing that live-action Battle Angel film?

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yes thats his return to films.... sounds kind of iffy to me tho, he is shooting it with 3D cameras.and alita will be pure CG.

If there is a God, the Dukes will tank.
Hollywood deserves all of their mindless TV rehash flix to crash and burn forevermore.

I'm an unabashed James Cameron worshipper from way back, but I have to like the odds with Battle Angel. If the man has a vision for it, it will be visually amazing at the very least. T2 essentially ushered in the modern era of CG in movies, and if he's been waiting this long to climb back into the world of hi-budget sci-fi action flicks, he's gotta have something awesome up his sleeve. The story of Gunm (sp?)/Battle Angel is still one of the best manga/OAV stories ever, so at bare minimum you'll have an awesome story and wicked special effects. Given this man's track record for producing great summer fare, I'd bet it'll rock. He hasn't put out nearly as many turds as Spielberg or Lucas. (A.I. or Phantom Menace anyone?)

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Originally Posted by Loopz

Given this man's track record for producing great summer fare, I'd bet it'll rock. He hasn't put out nearly as many turds as Spielberg or Lucas. (A.I. or Phantom Menace anyone?)

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Hey Man, I stand behind AI...
It was commercial falliure but it was a great movie.

It could have been shortened, added a Love story and had more action to "Blockbusterify" it. But it wasn't.

Didn't the stealth People learn from Skycaptain and the world of Tomorrow?

The good news is that Hitchikers is close to turning a profit from the theater alone and the DVD sales should be very good.

I may pick that one up. I did see it at the movie theatre and it wasn't bad. The main problem with HitchHiker's is that you can't stop at one movie. It's just not complete unless you go through the whole thing. In fact, much of the first Hitchhiker's is basically setup for what happens in the later books, so much of the humor and story is lost if they stop here.

It's interesting to see Mos Def as Prefect.

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Originally Posted by norton9478

Hey Man, I stand behind AI...
It was commercial falliure but it was a great movie.

It could have been shortened, added a Love story and had more action to "Blockbusterify" it. But it wasn't.

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The only good thing about A.I. was the character of Teddy. Everyone else sucked a dick as far as I was concerned. The film was way too long and didn't present anything we haven't seen in countless other Sci-Fi films. *Though I got comic relief out of knowing it was supposed to be a family film and there we have Jude Law starring as a Sexaroid Cyborg called Gigolo Joe, complete with him servicing a client while playing music out of his neck.

GK

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Originally Posted by norton9478

Hey Man, I stand behind AI...
It was commercial falliure but it was a great movie.

It could have been shortened, added a Love story and had more action to "Blockbusterify" it. But it wasn't.

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Nope, sorry chief.

A.I. would have been an OK flick, if it had ended right when the boy was frozen in the water. Would have been a decent ending. But when the warm voice of Anthony Hopkins swoops down to pick up and proceed to explain a whole bunch of very obvious shit for the next 30 minutes, that's what puts the official stamp of "TURD" all over that flick.

Spielberg's biggest flaw in his old age is a total failure to trust his audience to infer any kind of subtext. He has to spell everything out in 100-ft tall Technicolor letters.

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Originally Posted by Electroman

Imagine fellas when movie theaters will be a thing of the past? It'll be sad but funny at the same time.

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Cinema's answer to the television back in the day? Widescreen and stereo sound, later surround sound.

Now that people can get the widescreen experience at home, and can get similar (or in the case of DTS, what IS in the theatre) aureal experiences, movie studios will need to figure out how to upgrade cinemas to create the next revolution, or tank. There is still some incentive to go and see something on the FUCKING huge screen, but it's lessened IMO with the advent of big high def TVs/projectors and surround sound in homes.

Not sure how they can manage to trump the home theatre at this point, and the cost involved in upgrading all the cinemas would likely not justify the ends, since more than likely, given how we have it now, that consumers will demand whatever they do to upgrade cinemas for home use in a few years time.

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Originally Posted by norton9478

Didn't the stealth People learn from Skycaptain and the world of Tomorrow?

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OMG, does it get any worse than Skycaptain? Oh yea, Lemoney Snickets what a miserable movie. Put 2 kids in a film where they have tons of bad shit happen to them, grow up real fast, and no matter what, they never seem to need city subsidized counseling.

This year's best movie I've seen is Madascar. And I have yet to see Batman Begins.

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Originally Posted by slerch666

Cinema's answer to the television back in the day? Widescreen and stereo sound, later surround sound.

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I'd say IMAX theatres will be the standard in years to come. That is the next step. Or maybe the 3D camera systems like James Cameron is using for Battle Angel.

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Originally Posted by Electroman

OMG, does it get any worse than Skycaptain? Oh yea, Lemoney Snickets what a miserable movie. Put 2 kids in a film where they have tons of bad shit happen to them, grow up real fast, and no matter what, they never seem to need city subsidized counseling.

This year's best movie I've seen is Madascar. And I have yet to see Batman Begins.

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Now you see this is where I have to disagree with you and anyone else who hated Sky Captain. To me the whole C.G. IS the movie thing worked for that film because there's no real effective way to really tell such a pulp sci-fi story in the tradition of the old Airboy and Flash Gordon comics. Thus other than it retaining it's washed out slightly monochromatic look I thought Sky Captain was pretty good. The plot isn't supposed to be serious, it's cheesecake in how ppl really thought their then near future would be. Now for a movie like STEALTH, making the film largely C.G. doesn't make sense at all. The only thing that should be CG in that film is the automated fighter plane, the fight sequences should have been done in the TOP GUN fashion (i.e. real pilots dog fighting and what not) say in F-22s against an F-15 MT Active, then replace the flight paths of the filmed F-15 by inserting the CG plane. This way even the movement of the fake Stealth fighter look real and not processed.

GK

I liked A.I. a lot, I agree the "frozen" ending would've been the best end, but the tag-along ending wasn't too bad either. (although Kubrick had complained he couldn't figure out how to end the movie... it seems like his collaborator Spielberg just threw in the two endings they were toying with at the time).

I also like SkyCaptain as a mindless movie that was fun (and very impressive considering how it was made).

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Originally Posted by Grizzly King

...than ripping off and fusing Macross Plus & YukeKaze Japanimation shows.

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#1 reason for my lack of interest in the film.

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Originally Posted by Kirk Foiden

I may pick that one up. I did see it at the movie theatre and it wasn't bad. The main problem with HitchHiker's is that you can't stop at one movie. It's just not complete unless you go through the whole thing. In fact, much of the first Hitchhiker's is basically setup for what happens in the later books, so much of the humor and story is lost if they stop here.

It's interesting to see Mos Def as Prefect.

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Multiple Movie contracts were signed by the talent. Given the decent box office showing in a bad summer, it is likely that the next 2 movies will be made if the DVD sales are Brisk.

AI is what happens with Spielburg steals Kubriks idea's and makes them into very very very shitty movies. Not just the ending was bad. The whole thing was fucking bad.

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Originally Posted by Nesagwa

AI is what happens with Spielburg steals Kubriks idea's and makes them into very very very shitty movies. Not just the ending was bad. The whole thing was fucking bad.

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He didn't steal Kubrick's idea, they were working on it together for over 10 years. When Kubrick died Speilberg just decided to bring it out finally.

I guess the people who didn't like the movie didn't like the creepy vibe, I loved it.

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Originally Posted by Bobak

He didn't steal Kubrick's idea, they were working on it together for over 10 years. When Kubrick died Speilberg just decided to bring it out finally.

I guess the people who didn't like the movie didn't like the creepy vibe, I loved it.

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Spielburg ruined it. Thats all there is too it.

The creepy vibe wasnt what bothered me. It was the rest of the movie.

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Originally Posted by Nesagwa

Spielburg ruined it. Thats all there is too it.

The creepy vibe wasnt what bothered me. It was the rest of the movie.

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Or, it could just have been that it would have been a shitty movie no matter who/how it was made.

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Originally Posted by Grizzly King

Now you see this is where I have to disagree with you and anyone else who hated Sky Captain. To me the whole C.G. IS the movie thing worked for that film because there's no real effective way to really tell such a pulp sci-fi story in the tradition of the old Airboy and Flash Gordon comics. Thus other than it retaining it's washed out slightly monochromatic look I thought Sky Captain was pretty good. The plot isn't supposed to be serious, it's cheesecake in how ppl really thought their then near future would be. Now for a movie like STEALTH, making the film largely C.G. doesn't make sense at all. The only thing that should be CG in that film is the automated fighter plane, the fight sequences should have been done in the TOP GUN fashion (i.e. real pilots dog fighting and what not) say in F-22s against an F-15 MT Active, then replace the flight paths of the filmed F-15 by inserting the CG plane. This way even the movement of the fake Stealth fighter look real and not processed.

GK

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No doubt that CG worked for Sky Captain. I knew it wasn't a serious movie.

I guess what I meant to say, is that I just was constantly waiting for something to happen... and never saw what I wanted.

The only movies for which I'm exicted are Wallace and Gromit (HUGE fan of the show and of Chicken Run) and Tim Burton's Corpse Bride.

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Originally Posted by Gaelsano

The only movies for which I'm exicted are Wallace and Gromit (HUGE fan of the show and of Chicken Run) and Tim Burton's Corpse Bride.

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Seconded.

Corpse Bride is going to own so bad it's not even funny.

Tim Burton is a HACK.

"so bad it's not even funny" is right.

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Originally Posted by Nesagwa

Spielburg ruined it. Thats all there is too it.

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I think it would have been a better movie if Kubrick directed it, but then again after Eyes Wide Shut, it's clear he lost his mojo near the end so who knows....

I liked the look of the film, and the sixth sense kid was good, so was jude law, but it would have been a lot better if they just ended it in the ice fade away shot.

The whole 4 endings thing seemed like a fan script that dragged on too long.

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Originally Posted by Bobak

I think Fantastic Four didn't quite meet up to B.O. expectations, so maybe I can celebrate a trifecta...

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Fantastic Four exceeded expectations it's first weekend and a second is already in the works. I thought it was a nice jumping off point for the franchise and it can only get better now that all the origins are out of the way. Now that I have actually expressed my liking the movie, I suppose the most appropriate thing to say is "flame on."

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Originally Posted by Nesagwa

Tim Burton is a HACK.

"so bad it's not even funny" is right.

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Tim Burton is pretty much hit or miss, but calling him a hack is stretching it a bit too much.

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Originally Posted by hermegildo

Tim Burton is pretty much hit or miss, but calling him a hack is stretching it a bit too much.

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Hes only done one movie that I really enjoyed, and that was Big Fish, and that was based on a book and he decided to lay off his cooky artiste gloomy shit he does with every other movie hes done (excluding Planet of the Apes which was a piece of shit all on its own).

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Originally Posted by Nesagwa

(excluding Planet of the Apes which was a piece of shit all on its own).

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i thought that movie owned, gotta love marky mark.

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Originally Posted by DashK

i thought that movie owned, gotta love marky mark.

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Gotta love ruining a classic film for no apparent reason