Girlfriend advice - I need hellllppppp! - Updated!

As sad as this sounds, I am turning to the peeps @ n-g.com for advice.

Me: 29 yrs old - IT job for a major corporation
Her 25 yrs old - Works in banking plus goes to college part time

Situation: Started dating her about three and a half months ago and she moved into my apartment about a month ago (Mistake # 1).

Problem: She annoys the piss out of me. She complains about the way I eat, dress and the fact that I try to eat healthy. If I say I don't want to go and eat ice cream with her (for example), she gets upset and then tries to hit me with some sort of guilt trip. Then later she says she was just being sarcastic. Right. Also she gets upset when ever I talk to my friends and god help me if I want to go visit one of them for an hour or two. She is too damn clingy. If I leave the room for a minute or two, I get "Todd, what you doing/where did you go?" type treatment. Also, I am trying to start working back out again, if I mention doing it in the evening after work she gets all pissy and wants to know why I can't do it in the morning. She wants me to herself in the evenings. Ughh.

Ohhh, and when it comes to activities in the bed, she leaves a lot to be desired. Lets just say that I feel that I am doing a lot more than she is in that department. But I could deal with this and just accept it, I guess.


Whenever she moved into my apartment, she made it clear that if our relationship didn't work out that should would be able to just be friends with me and we could continue to be roommates at that point. Somehow I don't think thats how things are going to work at. If I went home tonite and told her that I didn't want to date her anymore and just be "roommates", it would devastate her. Plus even if somehow this all happened, how could I possibly bring other girls home if I decided to start dating again? That would be uncomfortable to say the least.


My problem is this: If I wanted a clingy, insecure woman then I would just be dating some 20 year old college chick. 'Cause as much as I like the girl I am dating, I just can't see myself being able to live with her for the rest of my life. Her mother and both sisters have some issues (her mom is borderline psycho) and I can just imagine her being the same way in a couple years. Plus I think she has already been dropping hints that she wants me to propose to her. Fucking A, its only been 3.5 months!! She started talking about her ring size a couple days ago and about a "I love you" ring. Hmmm...



Perhaps I should just become a Playa 4 Life™? Bang out all the local college girls and not look back.

OY! my head hurts...

take one of your spare copies of Ridge Racer

sharpen the edges

throw it frisbee-like at her neck, and never look back. dump the body in a nearby creek/stream.

after that, fornicate with multiple college sluts.

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Originally Posted by GiLL

My problem is this: If I wanted a clingy, insecure woman then I would just be dating some 20 year old college chick.

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Damn it, I wsn't going to post in any non-video game related threads.

*ahem* Anyway...

You've answered your own question.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

My problem is this: If I wanted a clingy, insecure woman then I would just be dating some 20 year old college chick.

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This doesn't describe a problem, it describes an undesirable situation.

A problem would be more like:

"My problem is that I really love her, but she's too clingy and I don't feel comfortable etc."

You're obviously not meant for each other - break up with her, be nice, but be strong and give her her two weeks notice.

Nevermind.

Ignore what I just wrote and do this instead.

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Originally Posted by Igniz v2

take one of your spare copies of Ridge Racer

sharpen the edges

throw it frisbee-like at her neck, and never look back. dump the body in a nearby creek/stream.

after that, fornicate with multiple college sluts.

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LOL, Igniz for once I agree with you.

Poke her pooper & post pics.

You fucking pussy!
Kick that bitch to the curve... and you answered your question already. :oh_no:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Perhaps I should just become a Playa 4 Life™? Bang out all the local college girls and not look back.

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I think you just solved your own problem

20 year old college chicks aren't clingy, none of them want a relationship, they are as big a players as the guys are, those are the type of girls i deal with everyday.

this girl sounds like she either REALLY likes you or shes REALLY desperate to have "someone", and you don't like her as much.

the one thing that bothers me is when you say you do a lot of work in bed, and she doesn't do much back. that means she's selfish and maybe even boring, do you really wanna be with a chick like that? that would be a deal breaker for me right there.

and wow, moving in after that short a time, definetly a mistake, she should still be only "sleeping over" after 3.5 monthes.

if you're with the right girl, you're both gonna be clingy and wanna see each other all the time, the fact you aren't like that says something. 90% of the time only one person is like that, the other isn't.

Weak in the sack = weak in the spirit.

You've only been dating her for 3 and a half months, and since it's clear that she's clingy, insecure and LAME in the sack, you need to cut your losses PRONTO. Tell her it just isn't working, that you need to see other people. Her moving in really adds a layer of complication to the proceedings, it's hard to bang other girls with your ex around.

As someone who spent SEVEN YEARS in a bad relationship I never had the decency to end, I can only holler at the top of my lungs....GET HER OUT NOW!!!

these things happen and they become more evident when you move in together. living with someone is always a gamble. there's some things you can work out, others you can't. if you're after something serious, then cool, I applaud you, it would seem that you just haven't met the right girl yet, keep your options open. it sounds to me like you rushed into a serious relationship and forgot your parachute.
sex is definetly at the core of a good relationship. you have to make her appretiate another frame of mind, arouse her, maybe you're not hitting the spot.
if the banging doesn't go bang then you either do something about it or take yourself out of the picture all together.

this chick you're with sounds a bit manipulative. she's probably used to having boys wrapped around her little finger. get out while you can and she hasn't gone too psychotic on you yet.

Just kick her out, of both your bed and your apartment. The sooner the better. Two roommates of opposite sex that share the same apartment with nobody else, can't do so without being a couple, and specially if they actually were in the past. It just doesn't work.

ive got a clingy chick myself... pain in the ass, i feel for you gill.

on the other hand shes nothing short of amazing in the sack:)

do yourself a favour and kill it off now.. the longer you wait the more attached shes gonna get. after just 1 month living together she shouldnt flip out too much...

Theres been some good advice offered so far (and some crap), but I got some more stuffs to add to teh drama.

She also doesn't like to let my clean up in the kitchen or even cook. You would thing most women would love it when a guy wants to clean the dishes and silverware and stuff. Noooo. Not her. I start to clean and she gets upset and demands that I stop doing it and let her do it. Also, she doesn't like the way I fold towels and put them in the linen closet.

If I try to help in the kitchen or even cook for us, she gets upset and tells me to leave the kitchen and let her do it. While we don't have an enormous kitchen, it ain't that small.

She is also one of these types of people that asks me if I love a trillion times a day. And then asks how much I love her.

Before I left this morning she knew I was upset and kept asking what was wrong. I finally told her some of what was bothering me but not all. She is off work today and no classes later on, so I figure once I get home we will be talking.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Theres been some good advice offered so far (and some crap), but I got some more stuffs to add to teh drama.

She also doesn't like to let my clean up in the kitchen or even cook. You would thing most women would love it when a guy wants to clean the dishes and silverware and stuff. Noooo. Not her. I start to clean and she gets upset and demands that I stop doing it and let her do it. Also, she doesn't like the way I fold towels and put them in the linen closet.

If I try to help in the kitchen or even cook for us, she gets upset and tells me to leave the kitchen and let her do it. While we don't have an enormous kitchen, it ain't that small.

She is also one of these types of people that asks me if I love a trillion times a day. And then asks how much I love her.

Before I left this morning she knew I was upset and kept asking what was wrong. I finally told her some of what was bothering me but not all. She is off work today and no classes later on, so I figure once I get home we will be talking.

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watch "breakin' all the rules" with jaimie foxx before you break up with her.

good for you man. I'm afraid in situations such as these things can only get worse. my brother is in a messed up relationship, the girl is psycho. he's lost alot of friends and I have lost a brother. I'm serious, when the chicks start throwing shit your way about your friends and to a lesser extent your family, then something's wrong, especially if she's being unreasonable. It should never get to that point.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Theres been some good advice offered so far (and some crap), but I got some more stuffs to add to teh drama.

She also doesn't like to let my clean up in the kitchen or even cook. You would thing most women would love it when a guy wants to clean the dishes and silverware and stuff. Noooo. Not her. I start to clean and she gets upset and demands that I stop doing it and let her do it. Also, she doesn't like the way I fold towels and put them in the linen closet.

If I try to help in the kitchen or even cook for us, she gets upset and tells me to leave the kitchen and let her do it. While we don't have an enormous kitchen, it ain't that small.

She is also one of these types of people that asks me if I love a trillion times a day. And then asks how much I love her.

Before I left this morning she knew I was upset and kept asking what was wrong. I finally told her some of what was bothering me but not all. She is off work today and no classes later on, so I figure once I get home we will be talking.

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How did you manage to find my ex, Gill? ;)

Being serious, now- I had a girlfriend who was really, really similar to what you're describing. Moved in too soon (4 mos), she started dropping the "let's get engaged" hints, and I went for it. Ooops. Dropped over $3K on an engagement ring and then about 8 weeks later I realized that I didn't want to be with her.

Oh, and she was terrible in bed, as well. Certainly doesn't help the situation when you don't even look forward to sex.

And she wasn't very stable, so I was afraid she would either start destroying my gaming stuff or my other stuff when I broke it off, so one weekend, when she was in another city for a volunteer thing, I took all my stuff and my cat and moved out. Left her a short note that said "I'm not happy anymore, and I don't love you like I used to" (little longer version of the same sentiment), and I went back to my old apartment in another city.

She was pissed, needless to say, but she didn't try to make me take her back. And now, 8 months later, she's actually glad that I did what I did (heard from a mutual friend), because she finally admits that she wasn't happy, either, but that she wouldn't have had the guts to break it off.

So I would recommend talking and trying to end on a better note, before you get to the point I was at and you feel like you don't have any other options.

Perhaps my advice is simple: tell her what's wrong, and do it now. Letting these problems grow without saying anything will fuck it up in the long run. I'm sorry to say I speak from experience. Now, if I've got problems, I say it right there... but in a nice way to let her know it's a worry of mine, and for "us".

If you're just tired of it all, tell her and tell her why. Quickly.

And sex is important. If you don't like it, soon you'll be dating a friend, and that's gay, too. I've also run into THAT problem, too.

Just nip it and move on.

Get it over with ASAP. I think that is the general consencus here.

I don't know what convinced you to move in with her so quick. Wow.

i say marry her it might smooth a lot of things over.

GiLL,

Man break it off. If its causing you more stress then joy, its just not worth it. Have you talked to her about any of this? You really should, clear the air and see where she really stands. You shouldn't be living a lie cause that just means a messy and doomed relationship. I know it might be hard to let go, but in this case, its better for you in the long run.

Peace.

Stick it out a little longer and learn how to compromise if you really like her. As we get older we need more stability and structure in our lives.
I'm not stating that you should give in to all her requests or demands but you both need to communicate and come to an understanding/agreement.
It's too easy to choose a reckless path .....and where will that leave you in five years if you're looking for more than that at this point in your life?
-BB

Plain and simple, you guys have been together for under 4 months and you sound as annoyed with her as any guy who has been plotting to divorce his wife for the last 15 years if only he could find a way not to lose half his assets in the process. End this before it really starts to take a toll on you.

Oh, and take it from a man who has been with the same woman for over 11 years now; the sex doesn't get any better than it is at the point in the relationship you are currently in, so if that sucks now you need to either be ready to contend with a crappy sex life for however long you remain with her or you need to walk away. Sure, eventually she may learn new tricks (if you didn't teach them to her and she can't explain where they came from be suspicious) or she might have an increase in desire when she hits 30 or so, but by then you won't be nearly as excited by her as you are new 25 year old girl in your life.

And yeah, you guys moved in WAY TOO DAMNED EARLY! That, in itself, was a recipe for absolute disaster.

yeah, its a really tough situation,

the relationship is over and only you know,

I had a hard time breaking up with my girlfriend of over 2 years, honestly i wanted to break up with her after 2 weeks of dating, but the sex was good and I had a hard a time finding dates. Pretty amazing if you think about it, sex prolong the relationship for 2 years... Anyways one early morning, like around 4 am, i called her cellphone and ended it right there on the phone. I couldn't even do it to her face. My advice to you is keep it short and sweet, dont go explaining everything why you have to jet, or her querks thats pissing you off. And move all your shit out to a mini storage if you can, she might just burn it all. :very_ang:

If she's annoying let her go.

Borderline emotional and crazy huh?

Get her emotional
Get her drunk
Talk her into writing a letter to you about all the bad shit she did.
Take a belt and suffocate her then hang it to something

The cops will htink the letter is a suicide note.. You get out of the situation.

How do you manage to stand her at all?

If you get into any kind of argument with her, use the magical phrase - "We both know we won't be together forever"

Always gave me good results, since basically, when you say it, you are just being sincere.

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Her mother and both sisters have some issues (her mom is borderline psycho) and I can just imagine her being the same way in a couple years. Plus I think she has already been dropping hints that she wants me to propose to her. Fucking A, its only been 3.5 months!! She started talking about her ring size a couple days ago and about a "I love you" ring. Hmmm...
...

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Its extremely possible she does have whatever her mom has (im guessing bipolar). My ex had it, dont want to get into details but from researching and reading so much about it your girl could be manic and having a whirwind romance which will just crash sooner then later. The moving in, engaged etc. etc.... all in a few months. On the other hand some people are just weird and do that shit, but if her mom has something then its very possible.

The motherfucking saga continues...



Just talked to her on the phone about 30 minutes ago. Was at lunch and she called me and I didn't pick up my cell. So, I called her back.


I tried talking to her about some of the things that I am unhappy with. She then said "don't you think there isn't things about you that bother me". I was like "Yeah, and you are pretty vocal about them, too!"


I told her about the clingy stuff and then she hits me with some "Sometimes you just don't want to seem to want to spend time with me". Well, I need my personal time too, and I can't help that. Its only human. Often when she comes home from work or school and I try to get close to her for a kiss or hug, she turns away.

She kept asking me about where this left us. I pussied out and didn't say I didn't want to see her anymore. I just told her I wanted to lay these things out on the table for her input and thoughts.


She has today, all weekend and monday off.
This is going to be a long fucking weekend...

Doesn't she have any friends or anything else than you?

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Originally Posted by Mushiki

Doesn't she have any friends or anything else than you?

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Honestly, no.

Thats part of the problem too. She moved out to this area several years ago and left behind friends in the Boston area. Since then she has had a hard time making any. I have tried encouraging her, but it hasn't got me too far.



Ohhh, and every once in a while she brings up her Ex fiance from back in Boston and makes a comparison of him to me. I HATE that. With a passion. Even though that was years ago, sometimes it feels like she can't give up the fact that that relationship is over.

Should of just ended it.

Throw her shit out on the street.
Change the locks before she gets home.
Buy a gun for protection (depending on how crazy she is)

When your partner is not worried about your whereabouts and does'nt offer to do things for you such as cook,there's usually no real love/caring and infidelity involved.
The worst thing you can do is discuss this matter over the phone as it's too impersonal of an environment which could get pretty hostile rather quickly...
-BB

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Originally Posted by BIG BEAR

The worst thing you can do is discuss this matter over the phone as it's too impersonal of an environment which could get pretty hostile rather quickly...
-BB

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I would normally agree with you on that, but she likes to keep pushing and wants to talk about things regardless if we are on the phone. If I say we can talk about it later, she goes into this "OMG - are we having problems in our relationship?" type defensive attitude.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

I would normally agree with you on that, but she likes to keep pushing and wants to talk about things regardless if we are on the phone. If I say we can talk about it later, she goes into this "OMG - are we having problems in our relationship?" type defensive attitude.

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To which you say "yeah, we are... I'm sorry". Rip the band-aid off quickly, otherwise it will REALLY hurt. This is coming from someone that took two months to do it like a pussy, but it's got to be done, man. :(

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Me: 29 yrs old - IT job for a major corporation

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Hmm...

Mead? NCR?

I was there for a campaign stop in 2000, I can't remember if those were the only two big ones. I spend most of my time recruiting students from UD.

BTW:

To hell with this girl. She's a loser.

There are loser girls just like loser guys.

Get someone else. When a relationship stops being fun, you're not with the right person. I've never let that happen and I've been in many long-term relationships that have been great but ended for reasons that were separate (I moved, etc).

I would never have the tolerance for a girl who acted like that. They would be beneath me.

Grow up, GiLL: you don't owe her shit -it's your life and you can do better.

[EDIT: also, this may not be your style so don't do this if you don't want: but I would be pretty harsh if broke up with her. I would tell her why she's a nothing and why her attitude sucks, that she's bad in bed, and that she's got very little going for her at all -let alone with you. Tell her to shape up in the hopes that she may have a decent relationship down the line. Finish it off by suggesting that she get some kind of counselling to help her get over her issues. Leave that woman in flames, she deserves it for wasting any of your lifetime. I admit, I've never been a relationship like that because I've always been able to screen those types out. If I ever did... whoa would I savor the moment I broke up.]

[EDIT2: You realize that she's trying to control you, right? It's plain as day and I assume you see that. Any girl who plays any of the shit she's pulling on your is trying to control you in the worst style possible. There isnt supposed to be control, there's supposed to be equality. Don't listen to her say otherwise because she's just trying to legitimize her own dismal existence by making you into a bad guy.]

[EDIT3: I'd start cheating on her immediately. Since you're already breaking up you don't have to wait for the contract to be signed ;) ]

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Originally Posted by GiLL

The motherfucking saga continues...

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1000000+point bonus for obscure NWA reference.

Get her the fuck out NOW dude. You know it's doomed, the pussy's weak, let it go.
Summon the cojones of steel and let it rip man.

become just as annoying and see who gives up first

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Originally Posted by neo>all

become just as annoying and see who gives up first

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lol

I actually thought about this. Just start ignoring her, hanging out with friends and playing video games all the time. But, that would be cruel and just side stepping the issue.


@Bobak - Thanks for the advice. I dunno about just totally torching her in the break up. That seems kinda severe. Maybe mentioning the things about her/our relationship that I am unhappy about, but just burning her to the ground on it seems a bit over the top.


Also, I am leary in the breakup too because she tried to commit suicide twice earlier in her life. I didn't know about any of this till around the time she moved in. I would feel sooo guilty if I broke up with her only to find out she killed herself the next day. That would be hard to handle.


I leave work in 2 hours and I am going home after that. She will be there. I have no idea what to expect. I will keep teh peepz updated to the situation with teh crazy.

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Also, I am leary in the breakup too because she tried to commit suicide twice earlier in her life. I didn't know about any of this till around the time she moved in. I would feel sooo guilty if I broke up with her only to find out she killed herself the next day. That would be hard to handle.

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yes but if you continue dating her you risk commiting suicide

Here are my responses coming to the party late.

-Bobak said it I think, "When a relationship stops being fun, get out". Now of course nothing will ever be like the first month but c'mon, the way you GiLL are describing it it sounds like HELL. i.e. "She has today, all weekend and Monday off. It's gonna be a LONG weekend." What the fuck? This is your girlfriend you're talking about -- not your worst enemy.

And that's my point: it's CLEAR you can't stand this chick. CUT IT OFF ASAP.

At the end of my high school career, my "fake friends" kept calling me to do this or go do that. They were a completely waste of my time. I slowly weeded them out. One night I finally put my foot down when they all came to my door.

"It's time to move on. I just don't want to kick it with you guys any more."

And that was that. There were a couple ASSES in the group that I just couldn't stand. I was cool with 1 or 2 of them, and I have kept in touch with those guys.

I know your situation is different but listen to everyone here. Cut it off ASAP. This relationship is broken and no amount of band-aid will fix it.

Of course we can only go upon that which you've told us, and ONLY YOU REALLY know the true story of your relationship.

but it sounds like it's simply just not worth it.

Don't settle, man. We can all do better.

Your chick is a headache and a loser. Cut the baggage and start anew.

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Also, I am leary in the breakup too because she tried to commit suicide twice earlier in her life. I didn't know about any of this till around the time she moved in. I would feel sooo guilty if I broke up with her only to find out she killed herself the next day. That would be hard to handle.

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Yikes! Not to sound harsh, but that would've been a major warning sign for just about any relationship. I can understand not wanting to totally bring her down in the break up because it sounds like all of this is a reaction to her own massive insecurities.

So break up nice, be honest, be logical... try to not make anything too emotional, stay very cool headed and almost distant. It's a little cold, it can get intense for her -but she'll react a lot better than in any other way.

However, don't let her hold you hostage in this relationship with her life. that's not fair, either. Just say its for the best for both of you. Say you can't be the guy for her and the relationship isn't working for you either. If you say you can't be the guy that will be best for her, it should work well. Just say it as a sincere apology. However, don't get to emotional -in fact, try and explain it like you're telling a friend you won't go into a business partnership. stay business casual during your breakup.

Dude, get the hell out of this doomed relationship, and do it fast! The longer you wait, the uglier it's gonna get for both of you!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Also, I am leary in the breakup too because she tried to commit suicide twice earlier in her life. I didn't know about any of this till around the time she moved in. I would feel sooo guilty if I broke up with her only to find out she killed herself the next day. That would be hard to handle.

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Please read this again:

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Originally Posted by Bobak

Grow up, GiLL: you don't owe her shit - it's your life and you can do better.

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She's a grown-up and therefore fully responsible for her own well-being.

Also, the fact that she didn't tell you earlier about her suicide attempts would be reason enough for giving her the boot. :oh_no:

I was gonna say start randomly bring chicks home and then when she asks play it cool and say oh i thought we were seeing other people.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GiLL

Also, I am leary in the breakup too because she tried to commit suicide twice earlier in her life. I didn't know about any of this till around the time she moved in. I would feel sooo guilty if I broke up with her only to find out she killed herself the next day. That would be hard to handle.

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Haha - I personally never take seriously anyone who "tries" to commit suicide, it's probably the most pathetic way of crying for attention.

More reasons for you to leave her.

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Originally Posted by GiLL

As sad as this sounds, I am turning to the peeps @ n-g.com for advice.

Me: 29 yrs old - IT job for a major corporation
Her 25 yrs old - Works in banking plus goes to college part time

Situation: Started dating her about three and a half months ago and she moved into my apartment about a month ago (Mistake # 1).

Problem: She annoys the piss out of me. She complains about the way I eat, dress and the fact that I try to eat healthy. If I say I don't want to go and eat ice cream with her (for example), she gets upset and then tries to hit me with some sort of guilt trip. Then later she says she was just being sarcastic. Right. Also she gets upset when ever I talk to my friends and god help me if I want to go visit one of them for an hour or two. She is too damn clingy. If I leave the room for a minute or two, I get "Todd, what you doing/where did you go?" type treatment. Also, I am trying to start working back out again, if I mention doing it in the evening after work she gets all pissy and wants to know why I can't do it in the morning. She wants me to herself in the evenings. Ughh.

Ohhh, and when it comes to activities in the bed, she leaves a lot to be desired. Lets just say that I feel that I am doing a lot more than she is in that department. But I could deal with this and just accept it, I guess.


Whenever she moved into my apartment, she made it clear that if our relationship didn't work out that should would be able to just be friends with me and we could continue to be roommates at that point. Somehow I don't think thats how things are going to work at. If I went home tonite and told her that I didn't want to date her anymore and just be "roommates", it would devastate her. Plus even if somehow this all happened, how could I possibly bring other girls home if I decided to start dating again? That would be uncomfortable to say the least.


My problem is this: If I wanted a clingy, insecure woman then I would just be dating some 20 year old college chick. 'Cause as much as I like the girl I am dating, I just can't see myself being able to live with her for the rest of my life. Her mother and both sisters have some issues (her mom is borderline psycho) and I can just imagine her being the same way in a couple years. Plus I think she has already been dropping hints that she wants me to propose to her. Fucking A, its only been 3.5 months!! She started talking about her ring size a couple days ago and about a "I love you" ring. Hmmm...



Perhaps I should just become a Playa 4 Life™? Bang out all the local college girls and not look back.

OY! my head hurts...

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You got three options

kill her

say ya gay

or

my most recomennded one

slap her & go


http://shadowed-thoughts.org/lj/rickjames.gif

a couple of things.

'tried' to commit suicide? you know if you really want to kill yourself, you don't actually have to try, you can just do it? what was her method? because 'suicide attempts' sometimes are nothing more than cries for attention. its the truth. she sounds waaaaay manipulative. put a latch on it.

also - she talks about her ex-fiancé back in Boston? so she was engaged before? what's wrong with this picture?

edit:beaten to it by Mushiki.

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Originally Posted by DevilRedeemed

also - she talks about her ex-fiancé back in Boston? so she was engaged before? what's wrong with this picture?

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I dunno. Every once in a blue moon she just pulls out of the thin air some comment or comparison about her ex. Couple weeks ago we were at her parents house and she pulled out a bunch of jewelry that her ex had bought and was asking her mom what she thought she should do with it. RIGHT FUCKING IN FRONT OF ME!! She could of easily pulled her mom aside and asked her. She knows it upsets me. I don't think she does most any of this stuff on purpose though.

Hey GiLL,

do yourself a favour and do what 99% of the people in this thread have recommended: dump her. You needn't be cruel or aggressive, but DO IT. I have been in a fucked relationship as well (not a possessive, "clingy" and manipulative girl, but a simply psychotic one), and I thank God every day for having left it behind.

Bottom line is, you have to take care yourself, man. If your gf/wife/partner/whatever starts fuckin with your whole life and making you miserable, there is only one option. Dump her.

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Originally Posted by GiLL

I dunno. Every once in a blue moon she just pulls out of the thin air some comment or comparison about her ex. Couple weeks ago we were at her parents house and she pulled out a bunch of jewelry that her ex had bought and was asking her mom what she thought she should do with it. RIGHT FUCKING IN FRONT OF ME!! She could of easily pulled her mom aside and asked her. She knows it upsets me. I don't think she does most any of this stuff on purpose though.

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I hate girls who aren't over their ex's completely. Maybe this chick is subconsciously using you to prove to herself she's over her ex or something. I duno. Girls can be sick like that. But always be weary of a girl who brings out her ex issues every once in a while.